Sunday, June 12, 2011

When to drop the "L" bomb?

Ohhhhh boy......here it comes, the topic of the day....."love"
Dropping the L-bomb on someone can be a scary thing.  What's the best way to say "I love you" - or is saying it even the right move for you?  I've got some "I love you" advice for every scenario, whether it's your first time saying it or your ten millionth time.

If No One's Said it Yet

If you're in a relationship and you feel like you're in love - even though neither of you have used the L-word yet - then it's time to put your feelings on the line.   Plan for an intimate moment when you're alone with each other.  Look into your sweetie's eyes and softly, sweetly say the magic words.  If you hear them back, lucky you! 
If they don't say "I love you, too," it's still okay.  You're better off revealing your feelings than hiding them and getting hurt down the line.  Besides, just because someone doesn't love you right this instant doesn't mean they won't feel it later on. Sung by Rihanna, one of my favorite songs, "Umbrella" When the sun shines, we'll shine together......told you I'll be here forever......said I'll always be a friend,....took an oath, I'm a stick it out till the end......Now that it's raining more than ever.....know that we'll still have each other....you can stand under my umbrella

If You're Too Shy to Say It

If you feel too shy to come right out and say "I love you" to your boyfriend or girlfriend's face, that's okay.  Wait for the right time when you're alone with each other, and after a soft, slow kiss, whisper it in their ear.  Someone suggested that you can also write it in note and slip it into their backpack or locker......seriously? No....No No! Not romantic at all......don't ruin such a special moment doing it this way....it's all or nothing here with the "L" words.....it is not to be entered into lightly.....think long and hard about how and when to use these three words.....I strongly recommend saying it out loud, to their face.  Everyone gets a little nervous saying "I love you" for the first time - it comes with the territory....but isn't that the exciting part?Hopefully, you'll be rewarded for all those butterflies in your stomach when they say the words back to you.

If They've Already Said it to You

If they've already told you they love you and you feel the same way, let them know right away.  If you can, say it right after they do.  If that's already passed, then tell them the next time you're beside them with no one else around.
Say, "I want you to know that I love you, too.  I'm sorry I didn't say it sooner - I just wanted to wait until ____."  Fill in the blank with whatever fits your situation:  "...the time was right;" "...I was sure I felt it too;"  "...I could finally say it out loud without peeing my pants out of nervousness."  (You get the point.) If you do not feel the same.....don't drag it out. If you can't say it back to that person, maybe love just isn't in the cards for you two? Nothing is worse than saying t and not hearing that echo back.....

If You've Both Already Said It a Bunch

After a while, those three magic words can begin to sound like a cliché.  Try out a couple of these creative ways to say I love you:
these creative ways to say I love you:
  • Write them a short, silly love poem.or sing the a jingle....it will always be remembered.
  • Draw an "I love you" cartoon and hide it somewhere you know they'll find it.
  • put a sticky note on their dash board so that they see it every day.
  • teach them the language of love in sign language
  • Give them a massage and spell it out on their back, letter by letter.
  • Dedicate a song to them on the radio and make sure they tune in to listen.
  • Give them a list of 10 specific things you love about them (or even more, if you can come up with them).
But don't underestimate the importance of just plain old saying the words.  Sometimes there's nothing better to hear than "I love you" whispered in your ear....and it's that 3 words that you'll always remember and get goosebumps over...so if you are going to say it and you've not done so already.....make it good! Make it memorable, and be romantic about for heaven sakes.

If You're Not in a Relationship

If you feel like you're in love with someone you're not dating - like your crush, or your best friend - then don't come out and say, "I love you."  Those are big words that might end up scaring the person away.  Instead, let them know your feelings in subtler ways by flirting with them, or take the plunge and just ask them out on a date.  Save the real lovey-dovey stuff till after you've gotten to know each other better.

If You're Not Sure if You Love Them

If you're not sure if you're really in love, then don't ever say "I love you." My thoughts are and always have been, be completely honest for this is such a powerful word. Once it is said and those three words have fallen from your lips,....they are soooooo hard to take back....So please, unless you are 110% sure that you do indeed love this person, don't say it. Instead, say something like, "I really like spending time with you and I like you a lot..."  But lying and saying "I love you" now will only hurt them down the road, especially if down the road you still can't say it, or don't feel it - just be honest. Be their shield, and protect them, for that is what we do when we love someone....

Now that it's raining more than ever, know that we'll still have each other......you can stand under my umbrella......







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