You Get Out of Life What You Put Into It...

For so many of us, we live day to day, week to week, paycheck  to paycheck waiting for the perfect time when life pays us back for all the good deeds that we’ve done. For some life is easy, but for so many more people like myself, it seems as if it can be never ending. Part of that is true..but for me, my life has been a dream. From the time I was young my grandmother, who was also my best friend taught me that if you wanted something in life, you had to work for it. That meant starting out with a plan or a dream and deciding how and when you were going to make it the reality. For myself, I have jumped many of hurdles throughout my life, and especially since my divorce. I had a good marriage, but like many things in life we lose interest, fall out of love, get too busy or get too greedy and always want more than the neighbor has. I know that this has to sound familiar to so many of you. It is, and can be at times like keeping up with the Jones family. But guess what? Life shouldn't be like that at all. We don't need to keep up with or impress anyone. Never compare yourself to those around you. Never waste your time worrying about those whose lives really don't have meaning. I guess for me that is where I learned my valuable lesson. I always thought that life owed me something...too funny. Guess what sister? Life doesn't owe us anything.

So many of us want, want want! Did you know that my ex-husband used to call me “Ineeda?” He said one day..."Do you listen to yourself?" It was always, “I need a this, and I need a that.”  Boy was I terrible. Perhaps that was the beginning of my wake up call to make some serious changes. It was time for my reality check. What I did learn after the divorce and about myself was this; no man would ever make me feel as if I did nothing throughout a marriage again, and no man would ever tell me that I didn’t work hard enough, or deserve what I had, much less to state that I wasn't entitled to any of it. Nope, those days are long gone and now it is all about me. Not the “me” as you might think. I had to put myself first in order to raise my two kids to the best of my ability.Without a strong foundation of parenting skills from my parents and grandparents, I would not be the woman that I am today. I am no longer the selfish woman I was, and I am no longer all about me. I raised my kids to be good to others, to say “Yes Ma’am and Yes Sir” and to have respect for others. 

So many people in today’s society are so busy and wrapped up in their own little worlds that they leave out the important steps, and key factors when raising their children,.... and we wonder why times are so different than they were some 30 years ago when I grew up? Look around you folks…your kids are a product of you. It’s like that song “Cats in the Cradle.”  13 years ago when I walked away from a marriage and all the friends and material things that went along with it, I realized that as miserable as I was, a weight had been lifted. I no longer had to be a wife, now, a role model. I have a relationship with my children like that of no other. I think the world of them and I believe that they feel the same about me. In fact, I know that they do. We are a team the three  of us, hell bent on making our way and always remembering where we came from.  I have always told my kids that if you’re going to dream, dream big. I took that chain if command and I ran with it. First I opened a travel business, then a floral shop and now two online lingerie businesses. All of this is the past 7 years, and I own my ups and downs to those around me who had faith in me and never gave up on me. In between all if this, cancer threw me a curve ball, but that only made me push myself harder. Being the optimistic woman that I am and a gal with an abundant amount of positive energy, I knew where I my was heading. I didn't need a map. My path was long before then determined by my destiny.

French writer and Nobel Prize winner Anatole France once said, "To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe." Many of us, especially those of us running small business, know how to plan and act. We make lists, we chase funding, we gather clients, and we bury ourselves endlessly in the avalanche of paper at our desks. We are, in fact, the marathon runners of action. No one can dispute the number of hours of sweat and elbow grease we pour into our business. The question is, how well is that approach working for us? Hour for hour, small business owners and entrepreneurs earn less than most employees in the business sector. Oh sure, we may bring home a large paycheck, but when we divide that paycheck by the number of hours we put in, how much are we making per hour? You see, owning your own business is not as easy as so many people think that it is. 

In fact, most people do not realize just how difficult it really is. If I had a dime for all the times that I wanted to literally pull all of my hair out I’d not only be rich, wealthy woman, I'd also be bald! Success is not something that generally happens over night. You work hard to find your niche. Once you find it you can feel better about calling the shots. Someone once told me if it were that easy to own your own businesses every one would be doing it. As I have learned, it is not easy. It wears you down, and really puts stress on your professional and personal life. Is it worth it? You bet it is. My advice is “never lose sight of your dreams or visions.” Your dreams can be your reality. More importantly, never forget your mistakes and the challenges and obstacles that you endured on your journey. 

So do you really want more? Well, then ask yourself this…Are you really living the dream you set out to dream? Was your dream big enough? Did you even have a dream? It turns out that one of the main reasons that small business owners work really hard without getting very far is because we don't have an inspiring long term vision that leads us, step-by-step, into the future of our dreams. Most of the time, we've either forgotten our dreams or didn't have one to start out with. Rome wasn’t built over night. Not everyone is cut out to be a business owner, and not all businesses make it. The lesson here is that whether you make it or you didn't, you tried, and no one can ever take that away from you.

 For me, business ownership has always been my goal and my dream. I was never looking to have a large business, but you never know what the future holds. You cannot get from point A to point B without a variety of hurdles. I deal with them as they come my way. I don't fret about things that I cannot change, but I do seek the advice of friends and family members as to how I can be a better person and business owner. "Treat others the way that you would want to be treated" is the only way to go my friends.Set a plan, and make it happen. For every one person that tells you that you will NEVER succeed, push yourself even further to show that that you CAN! To be my own boss, to go on vacation when I want, and to live by my schedule, not someone else’s was what I desired most. Spending time with my family is priceless. 

 Get in tune with your feelings and what you want. You don’t have to own a business to succeed. You do need to know your dreams and see their realities, whether it be in starting a business, getting married, working hard for that promotion, having children, etc. My grandmother once said that you only get out of life what you put into it. Caroline…you couldn’t have said it better! My inspiration was built on my hopes and dreams. My focus, and my goals are to continue to make them my realities.My life is now built around my kids, my parents, siblings and most of all my friends and coworkers. Without all of these people in my life, I would not be where I am today. When I wanted to give up, they pushed me to keep going. When I was too tired, they made me work harder, and when I cried, they cried with me. Thank you to all of those who surround me and as Bon Jovi once sang they made my life "Something To Believe In." 

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com