Thursday, August 25, 2011

The Signs of Abuse

This is a sore and quite sensitive subject but one that needs to be discussed. How many times have you seen in one way or another a form of abuse? Have you or are you currently a victim of it? This is a subject that I tread very lightly on only because I am quite aware of how the affects of one person and their abuse can destroy an entire family. Why do people do this? Low self-esteem, drugs and alcohol. So many reasons that people list for abusing...no one should have to suffer through this ordeal or be a victim of it. Talk to someone about it. Call goverment agencies and ask for local chapters in your area that are outreach centers to step in and assist. Ladies, call the womens shelters in your area. They have a great deal of people waiting to assist you and show you that life is better than verbal and mental abuse from which your life has been so accustom. You don't deserve this, in fact...no one does.
I have taken the liberty and listen belong a variety of reasons that people abuse others. Please see the list below naming common traits, as well as the types of abuse.
Personality Traits which are Common in the Partners of Abusers:
  • Intense need for love and affection. (See Love Addiction)
  • Low self esteem. (Belief that they can't have / don't deserve better treatment.)
  • Drug or Alcohol Dependence.
  • A background involving physical, emotional or sexual abuse.
  • ACOA issues (Adult Children of alcoholics / addicts.)
  • Codependent personality disorder and / or Love addiction.
  • Enforced isolation creating resentment.
  • Strong need for a relationship to validate them.
  • Gain a sense of worth by care taking the abuser.
  • Inability to set and enforce interpersonal boundaries.
  • Difficulty expressing anger, tendency to internalize it, act it out in other ways.
  • Loyalty to the abuser takes precedence over emotional or physical safety.
  • Belief that "it will change if I just try harder."
  • Repeated attempts to leave the relationship.
  • Inability to follow through with leaving - return to the abuser again and again. 
  • Clinical depression, self - medication.
  • Suicidal ideation or attempts.


It’s never too late to get help. Don’t hurt others….this is a type of abuse that will last a lifetime, and it is not healthy at all. When is it time to say enough is enough? Reach out and help someone if you can. Your actions will make a difference, and they might save someone’s life. There are various types of abuse which I will be discussing in a later blog titled the types of abuse.

Please, learn about this, and become more aware of the reasons why people are so abusive to others. It's time to stop, and help. It's time to make someone smile who has not smiled for a very long time. Ladies, I have said this before but PLEASE....clean out your closets, make generous donations to the  Women's Shelters in your local areas. These woman who are abused and in these shelters walked away from everything, or had to leave in such a hurry that they had no time to take anything with them.

Get involved  in your community. YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE! A lot of these women need help with their business skills. Take the time and schedule an appointment with your local chapter shelter, go in and teach a computer class, or help them to write a resume. Give them something pretty to wear to work, and tell them they are beautiful! With most woman, they've not heard a compliment in a very long time,
Help them, for you never know when it  may be you or someone dear to you in this same similar situation needing assistance from others. Lend a hand. You won't be sorry! It is such a worthy cause, and you'll be so happy that you got involved! Don't let life back you into a corner....


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