Guys this is for all of you out there that do the online dating thing..., so please, take notes and pay close attention here. About a week ago I was at work when a coworker shared with me a story about a friend of hers that is a single mother looking to date. She proceeded to tell me that this woman joined a dating site to try to find a nice man that would treat her well and accept that she is a mother of 4 children. What I learn was quite disturbing about a man that she met through this dating site and how the evening transpired into something that NO woman should ever have to go through. No woman should ever be made to feel dishonored by any man.
In this woman's case, she was honest with her online profile. She wasn't trying to be anyone but herself, and in the end she was treated quite disrespectful by her date. She met him for dinner, and afterwards he cut the evening short...got up and announced that he was leaving. I believe that she was a little puzzled by his reaction so she asked 'why?' He looked at her as he walked away from the table stating that she wasn't what he thought she would be, and told her she was 'just average!' What kind of ridicule is this and better yet...
WHO DOES THIS TO A WOMAN? I was outraged; and for many reasons, but most of all because I took a lookie at his profile and believe me, he was just average, had photos with no shirt on (whats up with that fellas? So not cool...put your clothes on, we want to see what's under the skin...meaning your true worth and values...not what you think is 'you' bringing sexy back.) Disrespectful is the word that is what I will state this man was...and that is me being really nice. He's lucky that I didn't date him. A comment like that and he would have been picking his testicles out of his teeth. Unless you look like Daddy Warbucks or Don Juan...and unless you are perfect in every way humanly possible, you have NO RIGHT to show such indignity towards a woman for her looks. Sure chemistry is important, but this is pushing the envelope just a little too far!
When dealing with members of the opposite sex it is important to understand that their thought processes are not the same. Guys...if you want to find a good nice woman then you'd better start doing the things that women love and appreciate. We don't want you to roll out the red carpet, but we are going to demand a little respect! You don't have to spend a lot of cash to make a woman happy.
Give her thoughtful gifts -- women LOVE surprises. Gifts don't always need to be expensive, but always from the heart. Gifts should never be about the "money". It's the thought involved and the reason behind it. It just shows you really care and she is the one you are thinking about.
Give flowers for no particular reason without waiting for a birthday or holiday. Even if you are away, you can order them online and have them delivered on the date you choose. Some of the best things are just a single flower she loves. Men sometimes think they have to be rich but it's the thought that matters most. Remember to send stuff to her office on occasion as a nice surprise. It isn't enough to make her feel important it's also important for others around her to see she's treated well.
When you are spending time with her, make sure she has your attention. Make sure you listen to her and talk to her. Just sitting beside her isn't always enough.Understand that little things mean a lot! A love note, rose, sweet text message or things like this just to let her know you are thinking of her and care for her.
Being polite and complimentary goes a long way! Women like to hear "please", "I am sorry", "I promise" and "thank you." Also, ask her how her day is going. Just telling her she is wonderful often helps. Thank her for everything she does for you. In addition, recognize that there is more to her than the physical aspect. If you don't use any of these phrases, you need to change your ways...
and ladies...if you expect a man to treat you with respect you first must respect yourself, so NEVER EVER EVER let a man in your britches on the first date. I don't care how hot he is or what song and dance he has giving you. If you do, he'll see you as easy, and he will probably think that you do this will every man you date and he'll find every excuse in the book not to see you again without hurting your feelings. If you are going to be a player and set up dates 4 nights out of 7. Have a game plan and act like a lady. Make him earn your respect and the key to those britches.
Be a good listener. Newsflash, it's not all about you here. Have respect for her thoughts and opinions. Recognize her intelligence and strong points. Even if you don't agree with her, find good points from both perspective's. It's paramount to her knowing she is seen as a total person. Never cut her down, even if you are kidding. Find something unique about her that no one has ever told her about.
If you are not interested...find a way to be up front and honest about it. No one wants a someone who just beats around the bush. It's really not all that difficult to say,..."You aren't my type, but thank you for meeting me, and best wishes to you." If you are a guy that just did to a woman what this certain fella did to the woman in this article...grow some balls and man up. She deserves that much at least, and a super big apology!
In this woman's case, she was honest with her online profile. She wasn't trying to be anyone but herself, and in the end she was treated quite disrespectful by her date. She met him for dinner, and afterwards he cut the evening short...got up and announced that he was leaving. I believe that she was a little puzzled by his reaction so she asked 'why?' He looked at her as he walked away from the table stating that she wasn't what he thought she would be, and told her she was 'just average!' What kind of ridicule is this and better yet...
WHO DOES THIS TO A WOMAN? I was outraged; and for many reasons, but most of all because I took a lookie at his profile and believe me, he was just average, had photos with no shirt on (whats up with that fellas? So not cool...put your clothes on, we want to see what's under the skin...meaning your true worth and values...not what you think is 'you' bringing sexy back.) Disrespectful is the word that is what I will state this man was...and that is me being really nice. He's lucky that I didn't date him. A comment like that and he would have been picking his testicles out of his teeth. Unless you look like Daddy Warbucks or Don Juan...and unless you are perfect in every way humanly possible, you have NO RIGHT to show such indignity towards a woman for her looks. Sure chemistry is important, but this is pushing the envelope just a little too far!
When dealing with members of the opposite sex it is important to understand that their thought processes are not the same. Guys...if you want to find a good nice woman then you'd better start doing the things that women love and appreciate. We don't want you to roll out the red carpet, but we are going to demand a little respect! You don't have to spend a lot of cash to make a woman happy.
Give her thoughtful gifts -- women LOVE surprises. Gifts don't always need to be expensive, but always from the heart. Gifts should never be about the "money". It's the thought involved and the reason behind it. It just shows you really care and she is the one you are thinking about.
Give flowers for no particular reason without waiting for a birthday or holiday. Even if you are away, you can order them online and have them delivered on the date you choose. Some of the best things are just a single flower she loves. Men sometimes think they have to be rich but it's the thought that matters most. Remember to send stuff to her office on occasion as a nice surprise. It isn't enough to make her feel important it's also important for others around her to see she's treated well.
When you are spending time with her, make sure she has your attention. Make sure you listen to her and talk to her. Just sitting beside her isn't always enough.Understand that little things mean a lot! A love note, rose, sweet text message or things like this just to let her know you are thinking of her and care for her.
Being polite and complimentary goes a long way! Women like to hear "please", "I am sorry", "I promise" and "thank you." Also, ask her how her day is going. Just telling her she is wonderful often helps. Thank her for everything she does for you. In addition, recognize that there is more to her than the physical aspect. If you don't use any of these phrases, you need to change your ways...
and ladies...if you expect a man to treat you with respect you first must respect yourself, so NEVER EVER EVER let a man in your britches on the first date. I don't care how hot he is or what song and dance he has giving you. If you do, he'll see you as easy, and he will probably think that you do this will every man you date and he'll find every excuse in the book not to see you again without hurting your feelings. If you are going to be a player and set up dates 4 nights out of 7. Have a game plan and act like a lady. Make him earn your respect and the key to those britches.
Be a good listener. Newsflash, it's not all about you here. Have respect for her thoughts and opinions. Recognize her intelligence and strong points. Even if you don't agree with her, find good points from both perspective's. It's paramount to her knowing she is seen as a total person. Never cut her down, even if you are kidding. Find something unique about her that no one has ever told her about.
If you are not interested...find a way to be up front and honest about it. No one wants a someone who just beats around the bush. It's really not all that difficult to say,..."You aren't my type, but thank you for meeting me, and best wishes to you." If you are a guy that just did to a woman what this certain fella did to the woman in this article...grow some balls and man up. She deserves that much at least, and a super big apology!
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| www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com |
I know men like this...great article, and kudos to this woman. Hopefully she won't let this bother her. Some men are just ignorant. There are good ones out there.
ReplyDeleteEllie H
Newark, NJ