Internet Dating...Perks or Ploys?

 Is internet dating the new super highway to love? That depends on who you ask. There are pros and cons to dating sites. Before joining one and setting up a complete profile read up on the company you've chosen to post your personal information. More importantly, what kind of people are using that particular site in general. Be careful when choosing a site based on the word "FREE." First of all, my grandmother always used to always tell me that you get what you pay for...So if you are a member of a free dating site, or a site that allows some free privilege perks, keep in mind, you may be the nicest person on earth,...but there will be losers, and dishonest people seeking only one thing. Usually SEX. Pathetic as it is, some people will sink to the lowest levels to get it. My thoughts are simple? Why join a site if you just seek sex? Go to the corner dive bar and pick up a local. Often free sites draw in the wrong type of clientele. Sound familiar? Just be selective with your choices of dating sites.

As dating sites increase daily and new sites arrive on the internet, men and women have so many new choices. There are many, many perks to online dating, but on the down side, there too are ploys. Personals ads are becoming the wave of the future in dating. Why? Who has time to go out and really meet someone anymore? With busy schedules and families (especially if you are a single parent) there is not enough time in the day to find a boyfriend/girlfriend. It can get exhausting, not to mention a total let down if the person turns out to be a real 'dud!'  More and more people are meeting online and through personals ads and these services are becoming a booming business. Gone are the singles ads of yesterday with phrases such as SWF seeks SWM. Today’s personals ads are intriguing and witty not to mention  informative and hopefully effective. How do you stay ahead of the game? How do you find 'the' right person for you without having to sift through 10-20 or more?

If you want to keep up on the current dating scene, you will have to learn all about the world of personals ads. There are a few key points to placing a personals ads which include being honest, being witty and including action phrases that will attract attention to your ad and make it stand out from the rest. My (non-personal) advise...do research first on the site(s) you are considering. Don't do this spur of the moment without some research.

 One key phrase to incorporate into your next personals ad is, “long term relationship”. This phrase is perfect because it conveys a sense of commitment. If you don't want long term, DO NOT write it...it's misleading! This phrase lets people know that you are committed to finding an enduring relationship and that you are not just looking for a fling. If you wish for a fling, don't waste your time with this, see above and go to a dive bar for local pick up quickie. Sad as it is, that's what a lot of people seek. Why? I've got no idea. Why not just advertise for sex? Same difference. Sure there may be those reading your ad that are turned off by this phrase but as long as you maintain your honesty you won’t include phrases that don’t express what you really desire in a relationship. Long term means long term. It means that you are committed and seriously looking.

“No baggage,” is another effective phrase to use in placing your next personals ad. This phrase lets readers know that you are completely free of attachments such as a spouse or children. Sooo, if you have 6 kids by 3 separate baby daddies, chances are a man looking for 'no baggage; is going to see your profile and BOLT to the door!  Again, there may be those that are looking for a relationship with someone who already has children but the majority of people who use personals ads to meet people are looking for someone who is free of other commitments.

You can spice up your next personals ad with the phrase, “Active and adventurous” or "sexy and spontaneous!" This phrase is beneficial for a couple of reasons. Active has the connotation of someone who is in shape because the reader of the ad equates active with physically fit. The word adventurous leads the reader to believe that you are romantic and daring which can be very intriguing. 

“Honest” is another word that should be included in all personals ads. It is very unlikely that there are people out there who are looking for dishonest partners so letting people know that you are honest is very beneficial. It’s important to not only incorporate the word honest into your ad but to also make sure that the rest of your ad is extremely honest so that the person responding to the ad doesn’t get a sense of a lack of honesty in your ad. If you lie in your ad, how on earth will they perceive you in real life? You can't hide the truth for too long before they find out.

Another action phrase to include in your next personals ad is, “great personality" or "social butterfly!"  These words let the reader know that meeting you will be well worthwhile because you have a truly magnificent personality and that you are a people magnet (like myself.)  It is also a great phrase to use because it indicates that you understand the value of personality in a relationship. 

“Enjoys travel,” or "have passport" is another action phrase to include in your next personals ad. Reading this phrase creates the image that the person placing the ad is well traveled and sophisticated and this is appealing to many. It also invokes a sense of adventure which many find appealing as well. Don't write this is you are deathly afraid to step foot on a plane or if your adventure seeking travel is within the state...thats not travel, that's a day trip/road trip. BIG difference folks!

Additionally if you are seeking responses to your ad from a certain demographic group you may want to incorporate a phrase that illustrates this. For example if you are looking to meet single women of Russian descent, you may include a phrase such as, “Seeks single, Asian women”. This may seem overly simplistic but because it is so clear, it will most likely produce the desired effect of receiving the majority of responses from single, Asian women. 

If you have a love of food or wine and enjoy exploring new restaurants, you may want to include a phrase such as, “Enjoys fine dining,” to let reader of your ad know that dining out is an activity you enjoy. This phrase can be advantageous for a couple of reasons. First, dining out is first date activity that many people enjoy so knowing that a dinner date is likely if they go out with you may result in a greater number of responses to your ad. Second, the use of the word fine in the description leads people to believe that you enjoy expensive restaurants and this can be very appealing to many readers of your ad.

Those who enjoy physical activity and keeping in shape, may include a phrase such as, “fit and active,” to convey this message. This phrase can effectively lead to you receiving responses from those who have a similar interest in fitness. While the term fit clearly means you are in good shape and may result in a large volume of responses from those interested in meeting someone in shape, the addition of the term active may greatly diminish the volume of responses and effectively weed out those that are not interested in an active lifestyle. If you hate to exercise like I do most of the time, don't write active...or your ass will be sorry after he/she gets you out hiking and biking! If I have said this once, I've said it a thousand times... JUST BE YOU!

 An extremely effective action phrase that you can use in your next personals ad is, “Ask me anything.” This simple phrase can lead to a multitude of responses to your ad. This simple phrase lets others know that you are honest, adventurous and open to sharing details about yourself.Be careful though...if you write this on a 'free' site you will have ever pond sucking loser writing you questions that are not at all professional, and quite dirty to say the least just to get a rise out of you. Think this one through before writing it in your bio. Your personal life, as well as your reputation are at risk and at stake here.

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