Online Dating...How to Treat a Woman

Guys this is for all of you out there that do the online dating thing..., so please, take notes and pay close attention here. About a week ago I was at work when a coworker shared with me a story about a friend of hers that is a single mother looking to date. She proceeded to tell me that this woman joined a dating site to try to find a nice man that would treat her well and accept that she is a mother of 4 children. What I learn was quite disturbing about a man that she met through this dating site and how the evening transpired into something that NO woman should ever have to go through. No woman should ever be made to feel dishonored by any man.

In this woman's case, she was honest with her online profile. She wasn't trying to be anyone but herself, and in the end she was treated quite disrespectful by her date. She met him for dinner, and afterwards he cut the evening short...got up and announced that he was leaving. I believe that she was a little puzzled by his reaction so she asked 'why?' He looked at her as he walked away from the table stating that she wasn't what he thought she would be, and told her she was 'just average!' What kind of ridicule is this and better yet...

WHO DOES THIS TO A WOMAN? I was outraged; and for many reasons, but most of all because I took a lookie at his profile and believe me, he was just average, had photos with no shirt on (whats up with that fellas? So not cool...put your clothes on, we want to see what's under the skin...meaning your true worth and values...not what you think is 'you' bringing sexy back.) Disrespectful is the word that is what I will state this man was...and that is me being really nice. He's lucky that I didn't date him. A comment like that and he would have been picking his testicles out of his teeth. Unless you look like Daddy Warbucks or Don Juan...and unless you are perfect in every way humanly possible, you have NO RIGHT to show such indignity towards a woman for her looks. Sure chemistry is important, but this is pushing the envelope just a little too far!

When dealing with members of the opposite sex it is important to understand that their thought processes are not the same. Guys...if you want to find a good nice woman then you'd better start doing the things that women love and appreciate. We don't want you to roll out the red carpet, but we are going to demand a little respect! You don't have to spend a lot of cash to make a woman happy.

 Give her thoughtful gifts -- women LOVE surprises. Gifts don't always need to be expensive, but always from the heart. Gifts should never be about the "money". It's the thought involved and the reason behind it. It just shows you really care and she is the one you are thinking about.

Give flowers for no particular reason without waiting for a birthday or holiday. Even if you are away, you can order them online and have them delivered on the date you choose. Some of the best things are just a single flower she loves. Men sometimes think they have to be rich but it's the thought that matters most. Remember to send stuff to her office on occasion as a nice surprise. It isn't enough to make her feel important it's also important for others around her to see she's treated well. 

When you are spending time with her, make sure she has your attention. Make sure you listen to her and talk to her. Just sitting beside her isn't always enough.Understand that little things mean a lot! A love note, rose, sweet text message or things like this just to let her know you are thinking of her and care for her.
  
 Being polite and complimentary goes a long way! Women like to hear "please", "I am sorry", "I promise" and "thank you." Also, ask her how her day is going. Just telling her she is wonderful often helps. Thank her for everything she does for you. In addition, recognize that there is more to her than the physical aspect. If you don't use any of these phrases, you need to change your ways...

and ladies...if you expect a man to treat you with respect you first must respect yourself, so NEVER EVER EVER let a man in your britches on the first date. I don't care how hot he is or what song and dance he has giving you. If you do, he'll see you as easy, and he will probably think that you do this will every man you date and he'll find every excuse in the book not to see you again without hurting your feelings. If you are going to be a player and set up dates 4 nights out of 7. Have a game plan and act like a lady. Make him earn your respect and the key to those britches.

Be a good listener. Newsflash, it's not all about you here. Have respect for her thoughts and opinions. Recognize her intelligence and strong points. Even if you don't agree with her, find good points from both perspective's. It's paramount to her knowing she is seen as a total person. Never cut her down, even if you are kidding. Find something unique about her that no one has ever told her about.

 If you are not interested...find a way to be up front and honest about it. No one wants a someone who just beats around the bush. It's really not all that difficult to say,..."You aren't my type, but thank you for meeting me, and best wishes to you." If you are a guy that just did to a woman what this certain fella did to the woman in this article...grow some balls and man up. She deserves that much at least, and a super big apology!

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

On a Date...Who Pays The Check?

So you get asked out by a guy that you've had your eye on for a while, but he is shy and perhaps a bit reserve...what do you do at the restaurant when the bill comes? You don't want him to think that you just expect him to pay the entire bill but he should because after all, he did ask you out...it's a touch call. One of the touchiest dating issues today has to do with money: Who pays, the man or the woman, and when? Once you're knee-deep into a relationship, you'll have worked out what is best for you as a couple, but in the meantime, it's tough to know what's expected of you.

Typically, men today are put into a "damned if you do, damned if you don't." situation. Some women are insulted if men always insist on paying. It may make them feel as if they are being bought or patronized, as if they can't afford to pay their own way. On the other hand, if men don't offer to pay instantly, some women will think that they're just being cheap or ungentlemanly. It simplifies things once you realize that, when it comes to money issues, there are only three possibilities:

• You are expected to pay
• She is expected to pay
• Both parties should split the bill down the middle

I say let him pay. This is a question that bothers many women. Do you offer to pay for your own dinner or movie ticket? If you do pay, is it really a “date” in the traditional sense - or just hanging out like you do with friends? When a man invites a woman for a date, he usually plans to pay the check. If he isn’t going to pay, then he needs to make that known up front. Some women are coy and expect nothing but for the man to pay the check. Honestly, I think that can be tacky, so maybe you can find a way to discuss the bill politely?

Maybe if you decide to go on an extreme sports adventure or attend a pricey live show, then buying your own tickets can work. Even when you only carry a tiny purse for the evening, you certainly know it’s smart to bring cash and at least one credit card. After all, if the date turns sour and you’re ready to go, you don’t have to ride home with a drunk or a jerk. Tell me that you've never had this happen to you before? If it has, then you have enough money to take a cab home. I call it  'hoping for the best while being prepared for the worst.'

If all through dinner, he leaves less than subtle hints that he’s only picking up the tab because he expects you to be dessert later, then by all means summon the waiter and get separate checks. Having that credit card in your purse shows him that you aren’t falling for that old line. Personally...I'd pour hot coffee in his lap then say kiss my ass, but that's me, and that's why I am probably still single.Some men think that a good dinner out gets them laid...seriously? Honey, you'd have to feed me half of Texas to get in my britches over "dinner?" I don't think so! My thoughts are these; if a man wants to get to know you, and I mean really get to know you, he isn't going to make a sly statement like that, and if he does he certainly isn't the man for you! A date is a date, no one ever said that you were the dessert. Unless of course it's going really well and you happen to like Reddi whip cream and handcuffs?

At any rate, you won’t know that unless you find out how he handles paying the check. In the early weeks of dating, most guys go all out to impress you and show you a good time. He wants you to think he’s a guy with good taste and makes the extra effort to please you. Enjoy the evening and don't sweat the small stuff. If all goes well, he'll ask you out again!

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

Safety Measures for Online Dating

In this great land of opportunity, we have such easy access to men and women at the touch of our finger tips. Yes, Online dating. But,...do we know everything about this? If you don't this is a good article to read. Keep in mind that what you read on a profile may or may not be of the truth, so use discretion and keep it safe. Regardless of how wonderful he or she may come across online, they may fool you in person.

For the sake of my research… I signed up to a couple of different websites to see what the fuss was all about. I set up on the popular free website PlentyOfFish.com. There’s different features depending on what site you sign up to, ranging from simple profile/message setup to full personality test and compatibility matching systems. The point of interest though is not all the different ways you can waste your time setting up your profile, it’s the people you come across whilst ‘browsing’. Be careful. There are buttons to block people that you don't want to contact you, such as 'married.' Ladies, if you are single and want a single man, I hate to tell you but a man (not all but many) will lie through their teeth, say whatever you want to hear for the sake of possibly having the opportunity to get in your britches! To these men who ruin if for all the rest of the guys out there I say....WHY? If you are looking for a quick lay, or an easy hook up, there is a dive bar on every corner, why not go there and find Ms Right Now? You would be surprised at the amount of men that wrote me. Word to the wise boys, don't tell a woman that she has a nice ass, or a nice rack, tits, etc. Rude and unexcusable....because chances are you've just been blocked. Next!

I’d say I’ve had my fair share of interest, but that’s not to say the overall system is flawed. There’s a common misconception that internet dating is exclusively used by people who lack the social skills or charisma to meet people in day-to-day life, or simply lack the confidence to approach a member of the opposite sex in person. I don’t think online or internet dating is a bad thing, and I’ve met some amazing people by striking up conversation. I have friends who are in great relationships as a result of online dating. For me, some chats have led further than others and some enjoyable encounters have ensued. But my god… there’s so much about it that’s just downright frustrating that it’s a wonder it leaves anyone with any sanity!

 No one wants a crazy loony stalker on their hands so follow the tips below;

1. Do Not Give Out Personal Information - Whether it’s via email, online chat rooms, message boards, in your personal ad, etc., do not disclose your personal information like your complete name, address, telephone number, work place, etc. And use a third party email address instead of one with your domain or work domain, too, that is easily traceable. For example, instead of using Michele@seniortimes.com , set up an email account like Michele@yahoo.com or Michele@gmail.com (search “free email accounts for places like this). Preferred dating sites offer email forwarding so that members do not see private information like this. So if you are on one that differs or makes you uncomfortable, move along and click elsewhere.

2. Do Not Lie - Be up front about your age and appearance. Better to not be caught in lies later on or lead someone on falsely. No one wants to have that feeling in their stomach of excitement to meet this beautiful person to only wait for that day when they walk through the door and look 40 pounds heavier and nothing like their photos appeared online.

3. Be Tactful and Leary - Do not believe everything you read in posts, in emails: in general online. You could be chatting with a child or someone faking their sexual orientation. The odds are that you will probably encounter someone a tad “undesirable” from time to time, so try to use appropriate replies, using tact, or ignore the encounter, if it suits the situation.

4. Use Caution in Sharing Images - Whenever you think about sharing a digital photo online, keep in mind that it may be possible for thousands to see it on the Internet, not just one person. Plus your photo can be copied, altered with different software out there today and posted elsewhere. If you do use your image, send one that shows you with a warm smile, not a frown.

5. Ask if Unsure - Go slow like the tortoise in the race with the hare and ask questions if you are unsure how to proceed in your contact and communications. Contact the site owner or webmaster (check for contact info when you register), ask trusted friends for helpful resources, check with local authorities. Remember that old adage, “Better safe than sorry!”

6. Be careful if you decide to meet for the first date. Remember there is safety in numbers, so meet in a public place with other friends around.

7. Keep copies of communications in a file so that you can show friends or the law in case your meeting or continued contact takes a bad turn. And do report any problems and cooperate with authorities. They can get information from your computer and communications to aid in tracking down culprits in some cases. Don’t try to take matters into your own hands and stalk the culprit yourself, though. Be safe.

8. Let men instigate online and offline relationships. Men still like to pursue. Online studies show that this has proven safer, too, with Internet dating. Men should make the first email move. And women should not generally reply to men’s ads; let the men pursue. (Sorry guys!)

9. So that you don’t appear anxious or desperate or both, generally wait for a day or 24-hour period before replying. And forget about replying on weekend and holidays, at least at first, and being available via instant messaging. This is especially important for women (double standards are still around and even exist in the Internet dating scene) – you want to “appear” socially active, confident, even if you are just laying around on your couch watching "Life Time" movies.

10. Don’t date someone who is already married to someone else – even if that person says he or she is getting a divorce. Let the divorce happen first. Otherwise things could get ugly. And you may even have to face the spouse / ex-spouse and children down the road. So think of others, too, when even considering someone who is not single.

 If after several emails or letters you decide to talk on the phone, keep the first call short, around 10 minutes. Don't tell them your life story...be private, you don't know them, so don't open up so fast. Plan to have to “rush” off. Your goal is to hear the person’s voice and talk a short while only, not seeming over anxious.Some men do complain that the ladies do not reply. So ladies, reply! At least say, “Thanks, but no thanks.” Remember, don't buy it before you try it! Make this person prove their self worth and integrity to you.

http://www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com/

Online Dating Profiles...Be Truthful and Keep it Simple!

When you think of going to an online dating site, what comes to mind first? You want to meet the man or woman of your dreams and possibly build a relationship together, right? You hear so much about being careful, and discrete but you want to impress a certain someone and you really want your profile to stand ot amongst all the others. One word of advice, and I am no professional, but I have experience...

While you might take some care to conceal your identity, and hey, that's all right....however, it's best not to lie. Do not try to bluff your way through a relationship because at some point the whole thing might come out and as we all know, one lie leads to another and then before you know it the whole relationship crashes down and then you ask "What did I do?" If you have to ask that at that point and time, you need to take a good hard look at "YOU!" Be as honest as you can, taking care to conceal your identity. Someone close to me once said that a friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you just the same. So there is no need to hide things about you.

Of course, you do not have to tell the person every ghastly, gory detail about yourself, but at the same time you do not have to conjure up stuff about you that simply is not true.If at all you do paint a very rosy picture about yourself, including things that just are not true, or are such far fetched exaggerations, and the other person does flip for you, in reality you will be basking in another person’s glory. The picture you have painted is just not you. Eventually this will catch up with you.

Your Alter Ego

When you choose a handle to identify yourself by, you have to be sharp. You don't want to draw a lot of attention to the degree where you are taken in by this profile, you want to be dignified and diligent in finding your special someone. You are not trying to attract as many partners as possible. You are looking for, quality not quantity! Try to attract only the kind of people you are interested in and who would find you interesting. Might I suggest you use a style that better defines the kind of person you are. Do not try to sound like a sex god or a sex goddess. If you are, let the other person decide for himself or herself. Instead of that you could try something that gives someone an immediate idea about the kind of person you are. The point is to win over people who are interested in the same things that you are. That, of course, increases your chances of meshing well with the person.

Keep it Simple....

Another crucial thing about writing your profile is that you should keep it as brief as possible. No one wants to real a novel. Who has time for that? Nobody, and that means nobody, wants to read through lines and lines of another person’s profile where it goes on, and on and on. If you make it so long winded the person who is reading it will get the idea that you are the kind of person who would love to keep on talking about yourself and instead of go on a date with you, the reader would rather go to the next profile...

But that doesn’t mean that you have to limit the whole thing to just a few words. A very brief profile will sound as if you do not have time for all this, but you are just doing it for the heck of it. Make mention of the strengths you can bring to a relationship. Positive things are what we all love to hear. Do not be negative.

The best style that you could use would be to be 100% natural. Write your profile as you would describe yourself to a person directly, no BS, no lies, just be you. Honesty and integrity are what most people seek. The conversation style has the widest appeal. Make it simple and stay away from big words and hackneyed expressions., unless you can back them with true meaning!



www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com