Online Dating and the "First Meeting"

So you've met someone online and you started communication process whether it be emails, chats, or IMs. Once you have started talking over the telephone, then the relationship has already taken wings. There really  is no reason to postpone a direct meeting unless you've lied about your entire profile and your looks, etc. What are you waiting for right? Wait. Listen... There is no need to push it. You should not sound overanxious to meet this girl or guy. Let the decision to meet evolve over a number of telephone calls. There are certain things that you can bear in mind before you really meet. I've listed a few that I found:

The First Date Rendezvous It is not advisable to invite someone home before you have really met the person. You had better choose a public place - preferably somewhere there are plenty of people around, just in case, you know. That is why most couples prefer to meet in a restaurant over lunch or dinner. There is one thing about having food together. When people sit together and have food together, they get to know a lot about each other. 

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Did you know that table manners tell us a lot about a person’s upbringing and background? You can learn a lot about a person by observing him or her eat. The second thing is that warm food has a wonderful effect on the human mind. It releases all those digestive juices and sets the tongue wagging. People loosen up a lot, especially after a glass of wine or two.The first mistake that most people make is that they go under the wrong impression that a meeting, even the first meeting must end up in bed. No, it does not have to be so. 

 Leave a Little Something Behind Now, suppose this date did work out as planned and you really and thoroughly enjoyed the company of the other person. You want the other person to remember you and think about you, wouldn’t you? So how do you make sure that the other person does think about you? The answer is simple. Just leave your mark behind. Mind you, a business or visiting card is not appropriate here. It lends a very formal color to the picture. Surely you do not want the person to remember you for your credentials or your designation. Something more personalized is more appropriate. A scarf, a glove, something that smells like your scent. Wear sexy lingerie to feel more confident but for goodness sakes...don't leave that behind. Make him want to see you again and later down the road he just may see your delicates.

Clothes Will Make or Break a Man or a Woman's First Date Impressions!!!

Good Lord, if I have said it once I have said it a thousand times...Dress approiately and dress your age!  You do not have to be dressed to kill when you go out to lunch. The best thing about lunch dates is that most of us will be in our work clothes and that saves us the agony of choosing the right thing to wear on a first date. 

A really wonderful thing that you could do when going on a fist date is to try to make it a group activity, preferably a foursome. This takes away the awkwardness of the situation and definitely takes away all those embarrassing moments of silence. Also, being with group has another advantage in that lesser attention will be focused on each other so that there is less stress and as a result both partners will be more relaxed. It is also safer too, since there is safety in numbers. But the company to be included should be mutually agreeable and not be thrust upon the other person. But take care to avoid any person who you know to be a chatter box; it takes all the fun away if one person dominates the conversation. You may drink...BUT if you want to, but do not drink too much on your first date. Not only is it in bad taste but when you are drunk, you might blurt out something which you didn’t mean to and that might ruin everything.Make it to the second date...take it slow, and listen to your date. What he or she says will tell you a lot about them if you pay attention.

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

Internet Dating...Perks or Ploys?

 Is internet dating the new super highway to love? That depends on who you ask. There are pros and cons to dating sites. Before joining one and setting up a complete profile read up on the company you've chosen to post your personal information. More importantly, what kind of people are using that particular site in general. Be careful when choosing a site based on the word "FREE." First of all, my grandmother always used to always tell me that you get what you pay for...So if you are a member of a free dating site, or a site that allows some free privilege perks, keep in mind, you may be the nicest person on earth,...but there will be losers, and dishonest people seeking only one thing. Usually SEX. Pathetic as it is, some people will sink to the lowest levels to get it. My thoughts are simple? Why join a site if you just seek sex? Go to the corner dive bar and pick up a local. Often free sites draw in the wrong type of clientele. Sound familiar? Just be selective with your choices of dating sites.

As dating sites increase daily and new sites arrive on the internet, men and women have so many new choices. There are many, many perks to online dating, but on the down side, there too are ploys. Personals ads are becoming the wave of the future in dating. Why? Who has time to go out and really meet someone anymore? With busy schedules and families (especially if you are a single parent) there is not enough time in the day to find a boyfriend/girlfriend. It can get exhausting, not to mention a total let down if the person turns out to be a real 'dud!'  More and more people are meeting online and through personals ads and these services are becoming a booming business. Gone are the singles ads of yesterday with phrases such as SWF seeks SWM. Today’s personals ads are intriguing and witty not to mention  informative and hopefully effective. How do you stay ahead of the game? How do you find 'the' right person for you without having to sift through 10-20 or more?

If you want to keep up on the current dating scene, you will have to learn all about the world of personals ads. There are a few key points to placing a personals ads which include being honest, being witty and including action phrases that will attract attention to your ad and make it stand out from the rest. My (non-personal) advise...do research first on the site(s) you are considering. Don't do this spur of the moment without some research.

 One key phrase to incorporate into your next personals ad is, “long term relationship”. This phrase is perfect because it conveys a sense of commitment. If you don't want long term, DO NOT write it...it's misleading! This phrase lets people know that you are committed to finding an enduring relationship and that you are not just looking for a fling. If you wish for a fling, don't waste your time with this, see above and go to a dive bar for local pick up quickie. Sad as it is, that's what a lot of people seek. Why? I've got no idea. Why not just advertise for sex? Same difference. Sure there may be those reading your ad that are turned off by this phrase but as long as you maintain your honesty you won’t include phrases that don’t express what you really desire in a relationship. Long term means long term. It means that you are committed and seriously looking.

“No baggage,” is another effective phrase to use in placing your next personals ad. This phrase lets readers know that you are completely free of attachments such as a spouse or children. Sooo, if you have 6 kids by 3 separate baby daddies, chances are a man looking for 'no baggage; is going to see your profile and BOLT to the door!  Again, there may be those that are looking for a relationship with someone who already has children but the majority of people who use personals ads to meet people are looking for someone who is free of other commitments.

You can spice up your next personals ad with the phrase, “Active and adventurous” or "sexy and spontaneous!" This phrase is beneficial for a couple of reasons. Active has the connotation of someone who is in shape because the reader of the ad equates active with physically fit. The word adventurous leads the reader to believe that you are romantic and daring which can be very intriguing. 

“Honest” is another word that should be included in all personals ads. It is very unlikely that there are people out there who are looking for dishonest partners so letting people know that you are honest is very beneficial. It’s important to not only incorporate the word honest into your ad but to also make sure that the rest of your ad is extremely honest so that the person responding to the ad doesn’t get a sense of a lack of honesty in your ad. If you lie in your ad, how on earth will they perceive you in real life? You can't hide the truth for too long before they find out.

Another action phrase to include in your next personals ad is, “great personality" or "social butterfly!"  These words let the reader know that meeting you will be well worthwhile because you have a truly magnificent personality and that you are a people magnet (like myself.)  It is also a great phrase to use because it indicates that you understand the value of personality in a relationship. 

“Enjoys travel,” or "have passport" is another action phrase to include in your next personals ad. Reading this phrase creates the image that the person placing the ad is well traveled and sophisticated and this is appealing to many. It also invokes a sense of adventure which many find appealing as well. Don't write this is you are deathly afraid to step foot on a plane or if your adventure seeking travel is within the state...thats not travel, that's a day trip/road trip. BIG difference folks!

Additionally if you are seeking responses to your ad from a certain demographic group you may want to incorporate a phrase that illustrates this. For example if you are looking to meet single women of Russian descent, you may include a phrase such as, “Seeks single, Asian women”. This may seem overly simplistic but because it is so clear, it will most likely produce the desired effect of receiving the majority of responses from single, Asian women. 

If you have a love of food or wine and enjoy exploring new restaurants, you may want to include a phrase such as, “Enjoys fine dining,” to let reader of your ad know that dining out is an activity you enjoy. This phrase can be advantageous for a couple of reasons. First, dining out is first date activity that many people enjoy so knowing that a dinner date is likely if they go out with you may result in a greater number of responses to your ad. Second, the use of the word fine in the description leads people to believe that you enjoy expensive restaurants and this can be very appealing to many readers of your ad.

Those who enjoy physical activity and keeping in shape, may include a phrase such as, “fit and active,” to convey this message. This phrase can effectively lead to you receiving responses from those who have a similar interest in fitness. While the term fit clearly means you are in good shape and may result in a large volume of responses from those interested in meeting someone in shape, the addition of the term active may greatly diminish the volume of responses and effectively weed out those that are not interested in an active lifestyle. If you hate to exercise like I do most of the time, don't write active...or your ass will be sorry after he/she gets you out hiking and biking! If I have said this once, I've said it a thousand times... JUST BE YOU!

 An extremely effective action phrase that you can use in your next personals ad is, “Ask me anything.” This simple phrase can lead to a multitude of responses to your ad. This simple phrase lets others know that you are honest, adventurous and open to sharing details about yourself.Be careful though...if you write this on a 'free' site you will have ever pond sucking loser writing you questions that are not at all professional, and quite dirty to say the least just to get a rise out of you. Think this one through before writing it in your bio. Your personal life, as well as your reputation are at risk and at stake here.

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

10 Ways to Get Her to Want You

Hey guys, let's say you meet this super fabulous woman and you want to get to know her better, in fact, you really want her to like you. What do you do? How do you get her attention without making a total idiot of yourself? Don't go over the top. That only spooks a woman out. Take it real slow. Knowing how to approach her is the first step, and the second step is know what to say or not to say!  

 One thing leads to another. Listen up...if you think you're going to get in her britches that quickly you need to forget it. Not so fast hot shot. What you want to do is you think about getting to know her first at her pace and then possibly down the road perhaps getting intimate with her. If you start it off all wrong then the walls come crashing down on you because you put your big fat foot in your mouth. Don't be afraid to speak, just know what to say and how to say it. Here are the don't topics that I suggest paying close attention to:

1. Do not consider yourself as unattractive.

If you feel that you are not attractive then there is no way in which you can make the woman find you attractive. This type of thinking will influence your body language and the way you think. You want to shine and make her think you're all that and a bag of chips so giddy up! Take some care over your appearance so that you feel at your best, and start telling yourself that you are attractive. 

2. For goodness sakes, try not to bore her!

There are times when men tend to bore women without even realizing that they are doing that. Never talk about your work, sports or weather when you are with a lady, unless you know that she is truly interested in the subject.Oh and NEVER EVER EVER talk about other women you like or that you've dated in the past. Woman gets pissed, red flag, game over!

3. Do not YAP too much.

If you talk constantly, you can make the lady turn her back on you. Trust me, I am the ice princess of this and I earn the nickname by friends for doing just that. If you yap too much she will either think that you are babbling because of nervousness, or if not, she will find you quite boring. Try to get her talking too. Even when the woman is shy you can do this. By doing so, it helps her to feel relaxed and in return you'll  find out what she is really interested in. 

4. Never ask too many questions.

I know it is weird when you are with a woman and have nothing to talk about. However, this does not mean that you have to keep asking her questions after questions. Asking a few questions can make a conversation interesting but asking too many questions will make the lady want to run away from you. Instead of interrogating her, pick up on hints in what she says, that show you when she has some real feeling about something.

A good way to do this is to repeat something she has said back to her in a questioning tone of voice. This will encourage her to say more but it comes across as interest rather than another question. You are building trust by creating connections and letting her see similarities, things that the two of you share.

With this technique you must only repeat actual words that she said. If you say “What kind of comedies?” then that is another question and she may feel she is being interrogated.

5. Avoid Yes / No Questions.

Avoid questions that can have Yes or No as the answer, e.g. “Do you like travel?” This can kill the conversation. Ask open ended questions that will grab her attention and make her want to really elaborate on her response.

6. Do not treat a woman as a prize.

A woman does not like the idea of being a prize or a possession. She will not be attracted to you if she thinks you are showing off that you are with her, or if she suspects that you will boast about your conquest of her to your friends.She is no trophy or arm candy. She wants to be treated with respect...got it?

7. Try to interpret her body language.

Many men do not think that it is necessary to read the body language of the women that they are interested in. As Julia Roberts quoted in Pretty Woman "Big Mistake, HUGE!" Body language us what you need to learn how to read. A woman often speaks through her body movements. By reading her body language you will have some idea about whether she is interested in you. If she is then you can carry out your seduction plan and if she isn’t then there are a lot of other fishes in the sea.

8. Flirting...Could this be the answer?

Well yeah! How will a woman know that you are interested in her if you do not give her a sign? Give her a sign already!! When you flirt with her, you indirectly let her know about your intention. It's as simple as that! You've just made the first move and taken the first baby step towards getting to know her.

9. Be CONFIDENT!!!

Women simply cannot resist men who are confident. Its a turn on actually...so kick it up a notch fellas! Do not be afraid to approach a woman because of fear of rejection. There are always risks in life and if you do not take the risk then you cannot reap the benefits. 

10. Make this woman feel good!

If you want to attract and seduce a lady then it is very important to make her feel good in your presence. If she feels happy when she is with you then it will not take a long time to attract her. Do this with respect though, because if she has the slightest feeling that you are trying to be slick willy and lay the moves on her took quickly, you'll get the boot and to the curb you'll go! Try the "Meet and Greet" approach. It works. Just be yourself! 

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

Dating Sites...Why Some Men Don't Have Balls

This may or may not come to many of you as a shocker, however, to those of you whom have never used a dating site or did, and were more fortunate than most women, then you probably won't understand at all what I am about to say...however, to those of you women some so very much like myself that over the years tried dabbling on a dating site 'here or there' to meet a good man because our schedules keep us too busy...well, you'll know what I am about to say is pretty much the truth. To all of you woman that truly do understand because you've been down this path, I'm sure that in some way(s) you can relate? What I learned about most men from dating sites was pathetic. What I learned was that they have big egos, think that they are all that and a bag of chips, and the lie through their teeth. (most of them that is, not all of them. I realize that there are a lot of good guys out there.)

I guess most people would ask, (because my mother questions this day in and day out)..."Why do women join these dating sites Michele?" A pretty classic reason for joining a dating site is that some people are so busy with work or other life responsibilities that there is simply no time to go out and meet people/date. Our schedules get hectic. We spend a lot of our time at work..Sure, the guys at the office are handsome but you wouldn't think about dating them because God forbid it turned out to go sour...then you have to look at him and pass him in the elevator, hallway, and break room day in and day out.

The old fashion ways of dating has become extinct more less and although some women find this a challenge, I feel that it can be a real nightmare for others. I was doing research not all that long ago and was looking for reasons women really join these sites? This is what I found to be mind boggling; one woman said this: "A lot of those sites are mostly lonely and often undesirable people. However, sometimes a plain man is better than a handsome one."Are you kidding me? Who says this shit? Lonely and undesirable people? Gee sister, you've now just pissed off a whole lot of people...good thing she kept her name anonymous.

Then I read this one; humor me please...."I was into online dating for a long time in my life & quitted when i realised that many of those who are in the online dating sites goes there because they have difficulty finding someone from the real life. (what as opposed to Mars?) then she continued to say; When i realised that, i also realised that i am into online dating because i have problems in my real life too." OK first of all, what I am about to say is not me being rude in any way, shape or form...but, where in the heck did you learn grammar? You can't spell and you need to fix your own life before sucking anyone else into it. Look, I'm not making fun of these people, I'm trying to make a point here...and that is that dating sites are NOT for everyone. So many people hide behind them. Someone once said that if you cannot say something to someones face, why would you write it? If I write it, you'd better believe that it is going to be something that I am not at all afraid to say out loud.

People think that men and women have to be a perfect 10 or exceptionally beautiful or handsome,...and then I ran across this comment; "It's a dating site for crying out loud, filled with everyday people - not an online model agency, and you're going to get a cross-section of society - some average, some attractive, some below average. Just because someone isn't fit to be on the cover of a magazine doesn't mean that they're not worthy of love, and if someone contacts you, you should take that as a compliment, even if you aren't interested. If you feel the sites are beneath you, why don't you go register on a 'beautiful people' dating site and see if they will accept you?" OK, I found humor in this one...it was heartfelt, real and the truth.

First of all, what makes women think that they'll find the man of her dreams on a dating site? I don't know really...but a lot of things contribute to this factor. Some do it because they are lonely and want companionship. Some do it for the free drink or dinner, and others, well some just want sex. Really ladies? Is this what it all boils down to? I find it repulsive that anyone could be happy with some "Joe" that they met on the Internet for a casual relationship when Mr Right could be out there just waiting for you to walk through a door. So I get why women do the things that they do, and believe me, I'm not applauding or condemning what they do, I am a woman and I have been known at times to be a little sneaky myself...nonetheless heartless. The difference between most woman vs. men is this; we can tell them straight up if this just isn't working or it we don't think it would be good to get together again. Hey, it's really simple...why beat around the bush...just spit it out and say "this isn't working" or "you're really nice but you deserve someone who will care for you the way you desire to be cared for." That's being open, honest and if he doesn't get it, he has issues.

In my case, it is real simple. I don't want to date a man with younger children. I love kids..and when I say that I really mean that I LOVE LOVE LOVE them, but here's the thing....I've spent the last 13 years raising my own being both mom and dad after my divorce and I am simply exhausted. I can honestly say that if they aren't in their later years (meaning in high school, or out of college)....bye-bye! For me, it is honesty that seems to get me in trouble. Men want us to tell the truth but when I do, it seems to have an adverse effect. Why would I want to be a mom or stepmother to children again after all this time and raise a family all over again? It's just not for me. I have offended some men in the past and some just recently by sharing this with them, but my thoughts are simple; at least I lay my cards on the table and they can either understand what my wishes are or walk away from them. It's honest, and quite simple actually... and as that song goes, Kay Sera Sera...

At this stage in my life personally I want a man who has gone down the father road, loves kids, raised his kids and now that they are grown, he can do the things that he's always wanted to do also. I want to travel, go to the beach, or just go to Vegas when I want to...no schedules to check, no "I have the kids this weekend" ...I want to just go! I love my kids and if I had to do what I did all over again I wouldn't have changed a thing...and looking back, a lot of good men walked away from me because I had younger children. At that time I didn't understand it but after a while I did.

When I began dating so many years ago after my divorced I couldn't wait to get back out there like so many of you also do. I married my high school sweetheart and never really experienced the dating scene...now here was my chance! Guess what? I hated it. Men were mean and rude and horn dogs. Some treated me like I had the plague when I even mentioned having younger kids. I had a saying, "There are three of us and we come as a package" meaning...if the man didn't like that and could not accept it, then he certainly was not the man for me! Now, years later, this is my time! At age 48, pushing 49 I can be picky and I won't settle. Might this mean me being alone for the rest of my life? Sure, that is a great possibility, BUT it is a possibility that I am more than ready to accept. I have become independent and can live on my own just fine and do all the things that I enjoy doing while running my businesses. Don't give up. Online dating sites do work for a lot of people. Love is all around us and it comes in various forms. They say that it happens when you least expect it to...so take my advice; be patient.

What I don't get is this; (and don't get angry, I realize that many women do this too) ...
Why do men put profiles on dating sites with pictures that are as old as dirt? Why do men think that they are Gods gift to women when honestly guys, a lot of you really aren't. Why do you act nice and then change shortly there after? Why say..."Hey, lets do this again?"... if your intentions are to never see her again? Why say things that you don't mean and build up false hope then allow the bottom to fall out when you don't call when you say that you will? Come on guys...Why not just have some balls and...here's one you might not grasp well...BE HONEST?!?!?!??

It is sad that in today's society, people can't just be themselves. It is sad when people cannot just look you in the eye and tell you the truth, and it is even more sad when they don't have the audacity to be human and treat you with the respect you simply deserve. Phone died, lost my internet service, too busy working, was out of town...excuses, excuses excuses,....Shame on you boys, no balls!

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

Wanted: One Great Single Guy

Do you ever wonder if there are any guys out there who are worth dating, and I mean, REALLY worth dating? If you tend to ask this question on more than just an occasion isn't it a question then that possibly every other woman is asking herself also? These great men,...I want to know...Where are they? And why can’t you find them? Oh, they’re out there - but maybe you’re looking in the wrong places.Take a step back and look at your habits, and where you go. Look at your life style and the places that you frequent. If you are spending all of your time in casinos, nightclubs and bars, honey, there is your problem. You have to step outside of the box and get practical or you'll end up with a hottie, but most likely a real asshole with an arrogant and flamboyant attitude. If you find a man that describes what I just did, sister, your better off sitting home on a Saturday night and watching a chick flick with a bottle of wine and Chinese food.

Have you ever stopped to think that maybe, JUST MAYBE...You might even know a great guy right now, but you’re passing him by because you aren’t sure what you really want? Get with the program sister or someone else will steal him out from under your feet. My guess is; that are you’re letting yourself look for men the way you shop for shoes - changing your mind with each new trend or mood. 

Finding the right single man is not about pleasing your friends or a competition for attracting the hottest guy at the party. Finding the right single man only happens when you know what you want in a man.Think of man hunting like bargain hunting at a clearance sale. Sure, the neon orange skirt is 80% off the regular price, but where would you wear it? That conservative black suit is a classic, but your style is sporty and casual - it just doesn’t fit with the rest of your wardrobe. Buying another tank top that’s not your size won’t look any better because it’s on sale than the one you already have that shrank in the wash. Mr. Neon Orange may be easy to lead around, but he would never fit into your world. 

Mr. Conservative Black Suit runs with a more formal crowd than your flip flop loving crowd. Mr. Too-Tight Tank Top is just like Mr. Jerk that you spent months crying over last year - do you really want to do that again?

You have to know what you want in a man before you can find him. So take out a piece of paper and draw three columns. The left column is for “What’s Important,” middle column is for “Requirements” and right column is for “Preferences.” 

The “What’s Important” column includes such items as age, income, appearance, moral value, habits like smoking/drinking, common interests, sports, commitment style and family values. Don’t try to fit any particular guys into this list - not yet. Prepare this list with absolute honesty. Decide what characteristics are “must haves” (Requirements) and which are “like to haves” (Preferences). Until you know this information, you really can’t make a solid decision about any guy. Maybe you’ve ignored nagging requirements in order to accept a certain guy as he is. That’s a relationship red flag. 

If you’re a personal trainer who is into natural foods, you can make all the excuses in the world, but you won’t last with a guy who smokes and craves fatty fast foods 24/7. The conflict between what’s important to him and what’s important to you means that one of you has to change. Don’t count on changing him. If you change your beliefs, how much of yourself gets lost? Over time, you’ll either resent him or resent yourself - the conflict in inevitable. Knowing what you want is the fair way to date.I dated a guy once that told me that I was bad for him because I was eating unhealthy. What did I do? I tried, and made a great effort to change my poor eating habits for me, not for him, and I began looking good...was he grateful? Apparently not...oh, and did I mention that he stepped out on my patio to smoke often? And he thought that wasn't unhealthy especially with some of the serious health issues this guy had? Really? He was going to make me feel bad? I don't think sooooo.....

Listen,....Why waste your time (and his) when the foundational elements aren’t there? It’s also important to be honest with yourself about the type of man that you really want. When you know how to describe him, you’ll have an easier time recognizing him when you meet him. Knowing what type of man it is that you not only want, but deserve is the difficult part just the same as finding him...you first must be ready for a relationship and open minded. Where you meet him and when is fate...at least that's what my grandmother used to call it. In today's day and age though, with much luck from online dating sites, things are made a bit easier for us aren't  they? Maybe you already know him - you just didn’t know yourself! Maybe it's time to give someone a chance and see what happens? Perhaps this is finally your time? Embrace it and take a chance...

www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

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Where to Look for LOVE?

Day after day I am asked....Where are the best places to look for love? Many people wonder...is it even possible to find real love anymore? how do you know if you're doing the right things? What if you're doing the wrong things? How does one really, truly know where and how to look for love? We certainly don't want to be looking in "all the wrong places!" Have you tried everything to attract men, yet seem to fall flat on your face each time? It's true - looking for someone to love is much different for us, today, than it was for our parents and grandparents. Let's face it guys and gals, times are certainly changing! If finding a great match seems impossible, don't give up hope! You're talking to a hopeless romantic herself, and I believe that it happens when you least expect it to. There are plenty of opportunities to find someone to fall in love with someone....don't rush it. It may not happen today or even tomorrow, but one day when you least expect it, love will come knocking on your door.

The truth is, there are no magic formulas, no fail-proof tricks, no cunning ways of trapping Mr. or Miss Right. There are however some essential facts that you should always bear in mind along the way. Dating tips are just that – tips, not one-size-fits-all guarantees. Different tacks will work for different people. It depends on the situation, who we are, where we are in our lives, etc. However, there are some threads of advice that are fairly universal and can benefit anyone who practices them:

If you want to meet someone in your immediate area, you could just be in luck. If you attend religious services, or if you take classes, you are very likely to meet someone compatible at your place of worship or at school.Coffee houses, book stores, and even the local supermarket can be good places to find guys too - it's just a matter of being in the same place at the same time. If you like a certain place and enjoy hanging out there, you're very likely to see others, including men, who are frequently there at the same time as you are. Don't leave it up to the guy! Strike up a conversation if you are attracted to someone. Some of the best catches are still out there just because nobody has been brave enough to initiate a conversation. Now is your moment to step up to the plate, take a deep breath and go for it.

Before you go for it though,....get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, be ready to commit to dating. Half-heartedness won’t work. In fact, it won’t even get you half-way. If you really want to date, put some effort into it. Do some research and think about what you want out of dating. Prepare yourself for the inevitable rejection we all face at some point in dating and commit not to give up.If you want the modern day way to find love...take a peek into the internet dating sites! They are a great way of browsing profiles and saying hello to someone. Match.com has been around for years. Christian Mingle.com is a good one, but this morning as I sat and watched "The Live with Kelly Show" she had Carrie Ann Inaba as a co-host on (a judge on Dancing with the Stars) and Carrie spoke of how she met her husband to be on Eharmony.com! What a great way to advertise for them, and she wasn't getting paid by them for it, she was simply expressing where she found true love. The only thing that really stuck out was "BE HONEST" in your profile. If she could find a man by stating "Crazy Cat Lady" so can you! She found a man who also loves cats and is a hard working business man. I sat as I watched this show and thought ..."Wow~!" At Simply Delicious Lingerie, I encourage you to be confident and go after what you want. Remember confidence comes for feeling good within, all the way down to the lingerie you wear everyday. Dress yourself up and feel sexy. People will take notice!

The most important thing in dating is JUST BE YOURSELF, BE HONEST, and take one day at a time!

Internet Dating... Is Love the Answer?

Day after day people ask..."Can you really find love on the Internet?" In a recent study, millions of people said that they believe you can. Have we made it easier for one to find love with out having to leave our house? Sure they have...They want to reduce the search to the click of a mouse and discover lifelong bliss. In the real world, however, it’s not that easy to find love. In fact, if it was we'd all be on the internet and bar, clubs, and the frozen food section of your local grocery store would be shut down, non existent, because those were the place we once went looking for love...turns out they were all the wrong places. We have such high expectations for love that no person can ever meet them, yet we continue to find love.

So whats the plan Stan? Well, imagine if you will that your heart is like a lock. Only one key fits it perfectly. That key is in a persons love for you. His  love for you doesn't fit anyone else and his love for them doesn't fit you. There is no master key of love that fits everyone. He has an individual, special love for every single person. Human love is an incredible thing, the kind of gift that puts purpose in your life and happiness in your heart. Fame, fortune, power, and good looks are like trash compared to human love.

Love is what everyone wants but it is not necessary that everyone would get it. Some get their love very easily whereas some other people, who even after making a lot of effort, do not succeed in finding love. Probably the true reason is they do not how to recognise love. Their love might have been by their side, but they would have just not known how to know that for sure. We would break this entire process of finding love into two parts. First one would concentrate on how one should behave to attract the true love and the other one would be stressing on what should one look for in a person to know whether that person is in true love with you. Finding love can be a lot easier if you understand what you need to be happy.

If you want to find love you will have to have a positive approach to meeting people and have an open mind that there will be some one nice who will be able to meet all your needs in a companion and who will reciprocate your feeling too. Obviously those who approach you will be people who have read your profile and will know what to expect from you when they do communicate with you. So be prepared for someone who is looking for the qualities that you have and not someone who is going to find you totally different to what they want. Also, be prepared for those who are not exactly being totally honest on the internet to deceive you. It happens folks, it only take one bad apple to put a bad taste in your mouth, so move forward with caution, and take baby steps. There's no rush is there?
 
Remember, you will have some options to choose from and need not be in a hurry to make up your mind. You can chat and then shortlist some and finally meet up and decide whether this is what you were looking for. The good thing is that you can go about all this while taking your time and need not have any feelings of regret or commitment until you want to do so.
 
 Look for love...it might be right around the corner, or even on the next page of matches chosen for you, where ever it may be, be prepared to find love and when you do, know that it is special. There is hope for everyone to get that perfect someone that they have been searching for. The online sites are designed to give people so much more room to decide from and with this almost unlimited choice it should not be difficult to find that one ideal match for yourself. There are a lot of people looking for love....but is love the answer? Many will say "You bet it is!" My advice, and it's coming from a non-professional; as my grandmother used to always say..."Follow Your Heart!"
 
 
 
 

 
 

Truths About Online Dating

Online dating is a difficult thing to tackle, if you don't believe me, how 'bout you try it? So what happens? I'll tell you...you’re faced with the challenge of putting all of your personal details into a predesigned format (profile) for others to pursue, judge and decide whether they wish to talk to you based on that one page of information. One page, did you hear that? How can anyone possibly form an opinion on someone based on one page? That's ludicrous. So, what should you do to ensure that your online dating profile gets a lot of hits,...and how will you find someone you are compatible with?

The first thing you want to do is choose a photograph of yourself. Some online dating sites allow only one photo while others let you have a few images. Either way the main picture you put on the site should be a head shot.  You want potential dates to be able to see your face first and foremost. If you are allowed to add other photos a fully clothed full body shot that isn’t from 100 feet away is a good choice, as well as a candid image of you laughing or otherwise caught off guard. Your pictures should have been taken within the past 6 months or sooner if you’ve drastically changed your look in the past 6 months. Pleaseeeeeee, no photos that are 20 years old ok? Make it recent. Don't waste someones time with white lies, in the end the truth does surface. Do you really think that they won't notice extra weight or a difference in your appearance?

Your ‘Likes and Dislikes’ list should include the things that are absolute deal breakers for you when it comes to dating. For example: Likes- Honesty, Humor, Health Conscious, Vegetarian. Dislikes- Smoking, Obesity, Eating Meat, Liars. Keeping these areas balanced and even allows you to make the point on certain unwavering areas at a glance.

When the questionnaire asks what you are looking for don’t go on and on about your dream wedding, how many children you want, where your first fate should be, and where you want to live for the next 50 years... Try answering the question as it pertains to the near future. You want someone that you have things in common with to talk to, go out with and get to know better. What happens down the road will be something you can find out together. Your online dating profile is similar to blind date chit chat. Keep it simple, and see where you want to go from there.

Your online dating profile is truly your first impression on the potential dates that are out there looking for the same thing you are. Taking the time to be honest! Be yourself, what's not to love? Still not sure what the 'rules' are? Allow me to inform you;

Online Dating Rules

• Always let them come to you, don't chase them via email.
• Block anyone who annoys you instantly. You do not have to tolerate whack jobs.
• Post the best photo you can find, and a recent one.
• Don't reply to instant messages with clever opening lines.
• Remain aloof and let yourself be chased.
• Always reply to emails at least 3 days after receipt.
• BIG NO-NO…Never provide your real email or phone details.
• Always date safely and protect yourself at every turn.
• Make sure your login name is stunning and sexy, as well as enigmatic.
• Do not login for hours on end. Short, rapid visits are best.
• Do not assume the person you are talking to is destitute or sad.
• Never ever reply to emails on weekends. Wait until a weekday.
• Never state how good your sexual performance is in your profile.
• If you don't want to date married men, spell it out in your profile, but even then there are those men who will still lie, or bend the truth.
• A man who doesn't reply to your email within 3 days should be ignored.
• Make sure your humor levels come across in text.
• Do not chat to hundreds of men at once. The delay in replying is a dead giveaway and your Mr. Right will be off.
• Don't even think about misrepresenting your size or description. They will find out.
• You can only come across so cool and sophisticated, my suggestion, for best results, but more importantly… just be yourself.

Ladies, always remember that you are a sexy, desirable woman and the world is your oyster. Always let men do the chasing and always allow yourself to be the chooser. Always stay safe and never risk yourself for the sake of attending a date. Always use a safe dating website and you might just meet the man of your dreams.

mEn...STrOng as a MuLe aNd TwIcE aS StUbBorN...

Ladies, do you know a man, or are you interested in a man who repeatedly tries to push you away and gives you ludicrous reasons that really make no sense at all?  If so, this is the article for you to read. Maybe he's insecure, or just hurt from previous relationships? Our past has a way of often keeping us in our past no matter how hard we try to push forward. Here are some tips of things you can do to try to without him thinking that you're only trying to "woo" him and show him that you aren't like other women. Whether he wishes to drop his wall long enough to see you waiving the "white flag" is up to him. No amount of talking you can do will change him, so don't even try, it must come from within. Some men change their ways and some just appear to be destin to be a train wreck! He might be stubborn as a mule, but inside there is a good man who needs to be reminded that woman are not all evil.

Don't give up...but don't give in all that easily either. When you make yourself too attentive to his needs, you'll find sooner than later that it is "you" that is going to get the short end of the stick. Although I am in no way saying a relationship like this is not possible, I'm stating that if you meet a man like this sometimes the best thing to do is to let him go. Here are a few tips for you to read up on. Quite important, so take the time to read this;

Tip#1: Don't ever ever ever give a man more than he gives you. This is what I would call a LOSING BATTLE! Here's the 4-1-1; Love, and inspiring a man to fall in love with you forever, is all about you being able to receive love. Sure most of us only know how to give. We give for lots of reasons - because we're taught that's the way to get to a man's heart (it isn't) because we see other women do it, and because deep down, it feels uncomfortable and scary to be vulnerable enough to really get what love is actually? What do I mean by this? When you shower him with affection, attention, dinners, gifts, and always go out of your way, it makes him think of you as a mother or a friend instead of inspiring his emotional desire for you. Knock that shit off. Make him come to you. He doesn't need a road map to your door, if he cares about you enough, he'll get there all by himself. He's a big boy.

Tip#2: Do NOT give away exclusivity if he hasn't yet committed... Mama didn't raise no FOOL!
Here's how it works ladies, and this is in all reality...We become totally, emotionally invested in a man when we're exclusive with him because he has all our time and attention. There's no way we can stop wondering about where the relationship is going? Right?  But the more we think about it and talk about it, the more we push a man away. In this case, we are damned if we do, and damned if we don't. It's like that Katy Perry song, "Hot & Cold" they (and when I say they, I am referring to "MEN") don't know what the hell they want. Grow up boys! Nice women like us are really hard to come by, so if you're looking for a way to really throw a monkey wrench in this it's working! The problem with most men is that they let the wrong people into their lives, and then they tend to push the "right" people out, this including potential lovers or mates. Why? They are afraid to get hurt, again?

When you can think of it in these terms, it's easier to keep your options open and keep your personal power in the relationship. Rather than talking about the relationship or threatening him with ultimatums, which you NEVER EVER EVER want to do....you can continue to keep your options open by dating other men. This way, you keep your class, your power, your boundaries, and he has to work to get you, as he very well should, especially if he is acting like a jerk.

Tip#3: Don't go out of your way, if he is acting weird and distant!
Yes, this sounds unfair, and yet, who pays is often the difference in his mind between friends hanging out together and a “date.” If you can dish it out he'll take it...but what about when they tables are turned? Perhaps he feels threatened or insecure? Is that your problem? How can you help him if he won't let you? Why do men shut women out? Overfunctioning is doing more than your fair share and stepping up to rescue a man because you know you can do a better job. It's arriving from your masculine energy. It feels aggressive and forward to a man. And it's totally unattractive to him. Men just don't operate on the same juice that women do. They are not built with the same type of defensive mechanism we are, theres is far worse!

Tip#4 Make him apologize! No If's and's or But's about it!
I'm sorry guys but there is no excuse for your childish behavior, and this is exactly what it is, you acting like an immature little boy....especially when a woman is seriously trying to do all that she can to get to know you. We all have a wall built up around us that we don't wish to talk about, we've all experienced some sort of pain at least once in our life, but isn't part of getting to know someone sharing with them intimate details of your life that make you feel vulnerable? Is this easy to do? Hell no it's not. Do you really want to chase the right woman away because you think she'll only turn out to be like all of the other "wrong" ones? Nahhh, it's time to suck it up and realize that you are being an ass and treating a woman with much disrespect. Yes men can be pig-headed and stubborn, so can we...I am the first to admit it, but I am also the first to admit when I am wrong and say "I'm Sorry!" Rome wasn't built over night, relationships aren't easy...if there were we'd all be in one right now, wouldn't we?

Alas, enough of the cold shoulder. I still don't know what I was waiting for...and my time was running wild, a million dead-end streets, every time I thought I'd got it made, it seemed the taste was not so sweet, so I turned myself to face me, but I've never caught a glimpse.... time may change me....but I can't trace time.

Well spoken lyrics from David Bowie, for those men who feel that they have been running in circles, that they don't deserve true love, and I mean real true love, not some puppy love or a controlled type of love, but "physical real love" I say to you what I have said to my readers and I will preach to you what my grandmother used to always preach to me; God puts certain people in our lives for a reason, you may not know who, or why it is that they are coming your way, but try to accept it, even if it's only meant to be as a friendship. We know how head strong a man can be, I'm just saying...try.

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