Sunday, September 11, 2011

So You Got Dumped?

So what do you do when you get dumped? Breaking up hurts because it activates a grief reaction. It touches a lot of senses actually. You're angry, and mad, you cry....or you just get on with your life. But you feel as if you've lost something, especially if you spend a great length of time with this person. No one every likes to get dumped. I was always the dumper. Never be the dumpee. Either way, its still difficult when you ditch someone. If you have any shred of humanity, you feel bad about it, but you realize that it just wouldn't work long term. Some people think that they can remain friends after a break up. I don't think so. Why not just cut your losses and move on? Easier said than done.

Most often people go through sadness, anger and hurt. Feelings of betrayal, rejection and abandonment are common at the end of a relationship. Although this is a normal response to losing someone important, you will feel anything but “normal.” Take good care of yourself during this time, don't try to run from your pain, and reach out to friends and family for support....and don't look back on this person, they sure a shit didn't think much of you when they dumped you. Don't waste your time wondering "what if?" ...At least not with this matter. You'll beat yourself into the ground and still come out feeling poorly.

Break up quotes are plentiful because as as Neil Sedaka said in a song “Breaking up is hard to do.” All kinds of feelings come up: grief, loss, sadness, anger, betrayal, abandonment. To make matters worse, getting over a break up is not something that can be rushed.

Attempting to hurry past emotions or avoid them altogether is never advised. When unrecognized, minimized or dismissed the pesky things tend to linger even longer! Therefore, the common tricks of keeping so busy you don't notice yourself or beginning to date immediately are counterproductive. Instead, make time for your feelings, take good care of yourself, and turn to family and friends for support. Get out and start a new. There is a big world out there waiting for you,...and there is someone who lays his/her head to sleep at night that wishes for the same things you do. Love find you when you least expect it. First you must get past the heartbreak.



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