Do You Feel Pressure Being 'Single?'

When was the last time that you were asked to go out with friends and you were the only one flying solo? Did you not feel like a 'third wheel?" Listen, you certainly are not the only one. Being single used to be like have herpes, and you were singled out, but not any more my friends...not any more! I think that there's nothing wrong with being single, and let's face it, not everyone wants to be in a committed relationship. Why? Well helloooo? Too much work! 

There’s a lot of pressure associated with being single. You couldn't pay me to jump into something right now...This whole dating era is nothing like it was some 20+ years ago when I dated. Back in the day things were easier...life was not so difficult, and people weren't quite so demanding.

You have friends who are married or in relationships, and the media is relentlessly showing you visions of people who have one date after another, with hardly a moment to breathe.You want to find a nice woman to date, and you’d like to find a nice woman to share your life with, but you’re not so sure about the idea of trying to date seven nights a week, no matter what the dating gurus tell you.I get it...nor would I want to do that. It's just way too much work! 

It’s fun to have a busy social life, but let’s be real about this - quantity does not equal quality and dating just because you feel some social pressure to, is dating for the wrong reason. Let’s take some of the pressure off and take a sane and realistic approach to dating. 

So what exactly do we know?

• We know that you’ll probably have to date in order to find the right girl.
• We know that you’ll probably have to date several people before you find the right girl.
• We know that trying to do everything in a rush is never a good idea. That’s because when you start to rush into things, the chances of not being prepared are greater and the chances of doing things you’ll regret increase.
• We know that if you’re out every night on a date, you’ll most likely wear yourself out and end up tired and disappointed because you’re not paying attention to quality vs. quantity.This is something that is really important. Quality is such a necessity...but you won't find it if you are just grasping at straws and taking out anything with a smile and nice legs. Look beneath the surface my friends...these are the woman that you are going to want to be with long term. These are the types of women that you will build a trusting relationship with. Take your time..the right woman will very much be worth the wait.

My advice, and I am NOT at all a professional....You need to relax a bit and not be in such a huge hurry. Even if you’ve waited all your life to find Mrs. Right, and you don’t want to miss out, you still have to get your head on straight and take a sane approach to dating, not a frenzied one. Since you’ll probably need to date several women to find the right girl for you, you should commit yourself to approaching dating in a relaxed manner, knowing that any girl could be her, but any girl might not be, too. 

The pressure to be paired-up is heavy for both men and women, and it doesn’t matter if you’re 20 or 70. Well-meaning friends and colleagues, not to mention your family want to know when you’re going to settle down and find a girlfriend or wife. They must have forgotten that good women don’t just fall out of the sky and into your yard with your name pinned to their blouse.  

Finding the right mate takes time, patience and effort. Don’t allow yourself to fixate on the number of dates you’ve had in the last week, month or year. By using a sensible approach to dating and not rushing yourself, you’ll find that you have better results. This isn’t to say that you should simply sit at home waiting for her to show up. You still have to put yourself out there and take risks if you want the rewards...in the end it will be well worth it!

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