You are my Drug, I Have an Addiction

Is happily ever after so once upon a time? It's not very often that we find something, or someone that seems to fit so perfectly in our life that we become compelled to want more of it. Every month, week, day and hour we become dependent on this one thing a little more than the last time and we become the addict. It gets to be like a craving that needs fed constantly. There are various forms of addictions....drug addiction, sexual addictions, gambling addictions, alcohol addictions, etc. Like most of these, I'm not that kind of addict. It's something far more than that.....Imagine a runaway train.... My heart, my mind, my thoughts, have been saturated. In a sense you are my drug, and I have an addiction.

 I am not at all the type of woman to let a man creep under my skin. Most men I can read from a mile away. My radar goes off and more often than not,I begin seeing red flags and I fear hearing all of their empty promises. Then one day, when I least expected it, someone from my past comes back into my life and since that day, life has been eccentric, and everything that I knew, has changed. Imagine living in a world where your existence remained the same and then one day, your life is like that of  Alice in Wonderland.....you feel like you're living in a place of make believe,  where all your thoughts escape to, and you're just waiting for that dream to end.....How can someone  make you feel the things that you feel and feed your addictions? That adoration, hunger,…is incredible and knowing that so many women hope for a man like this, I find myself in a world of self-indulgence. The more I hear his voice, the more I want him. Somehow, I feel like I've been given a second chance to start a new chapter in my life. Having learned from so many of my past mistakes, I move forward with caution and wonder into chapter one of new beginnings.

A few things occur.....We can try to fight this feeling and fail miserably, or we can give in to it and as Robert Palmer once said ......you're gonna have to face it you're "addicted to love." Does love really exist and how can you tell if you have these feelings? My feelings have been dormant for so long that I feel disabled at times. His voice enduring, captures my heart. What are the coincidences of finding that one right person that makes you so vulnerable that you begin to wonder if fate has finally stepped in or if this is your destiny calling? I've always been the one to take the path less traveled, and for a few reasons, 1) I am not at all like everyone else, and 2) I prefer the scenic route where things are pure and somewhat undiscovered. To find love would be like an eccentricity of my ordinary common life. There is no being halfhearted. Give this all that you have, for once upon a time may be the only chance you get!