Dating...It's all about Honesty and Integrity

Let’s talk a bit about dating, honesty and integrity today. Integrity is really related to honesty, and I think that integrity is really the benchmark of what determines whether you are a good or bad person. Now lets talk about lies and dating. They've always gone together like birds of a feather.  As sad a it is, lying has gotten even easier with the anonymity of online dating. So who's really lying on dating sites and what lies are they telling?

When I searched for the real facts I was crushed to think that you could not find a good person on a dating site, so I tried it myself. Truth is, most men walk the walk but surely do not talk the talk. When it comes to online dating, there is one cardinal truth that you must keep in mind - almost everyone out there is lying. This is not done purposely to misrepresent facts, but to build a profile that would impress the opposite sex and hence lead to success in the dating world.

My problem is this, what happens to the woman who is busy and business savvy that goes on one of these sites searching for a "needle in a haystack man" who is trying to be herself? She is sincere and open and when she asks questions or sees a possible red flag is shot down and demeaned by a man who knows very little about her, in fact he knows only what he assumes? Sure they fire away at you all the while they have just totally blown their one shot to possibly meet a really great woman who would in fact take and make the time for the right guy if and when he came along. What happens when you'd like to meet someone but your schedule is merely too busy, especially during holidays? What do we have to do to prove ourselves and even more so, WHY should we have to prove anything?

People lie on dating sites and it make my job and all of your whom are reading this even more difficult to explain yourself. Scammers and hypocrites are out there and they are taking away the one last chance some of us
work-a-holics have at possibly meeting someone without all that 'red tape' as I tend to call it. What happened to truth and honesty?
Most women are nothing less than a nice women with integrity. I guess some men want more. What must be considered as lying as far as online dating is concerned? It happens when you present yourself differently than who you really are. This includes your marital status, the kind of work you do, your physical appearance, your hobbies and interests, your relationship history, and other information that you put up on these sites. If we have nothing else at least we remain integral in our own lives, and if we keep the integrity alive within us all then we will eventually be shown into it. Because integrity's promise states that we will get what we deserve when it comes down to it, and we will manage to get whatever we want out of life if we can manage to keep our integrity intact. With integrity and belief we manage to keep out of trouble and keep our heads above water. If we manage to do this then we will get everything we deserve out of the game we crave so badly.

 Guys, this is for all of you who speak before you think....when it comes to life and love there are only two things that rally matter; integrity and honesty. Believe it or not they are what women look for without even realising that they do. If they learn what they need to about you then they will find out that you are exactly what they are looking for in a man, including the fact that you are the one and only ideal man for them. So don't be nervous to remain hospitable and keep your integrity as well as making off with what you want from them. This means, don't jump the gun and make assumptions. Make the best of what you have and ponder it for answers and results. It is pivotal that you remain guarded with your integrity intact. Want some FREE Advice? Be YOU..., yes that's right...BE 100% YOU! If someone doesn't like it, they certainly are not the one intended to share your time nonetheless your oxygen with.

Dating over 50

A few years ago when I divorced and found myself starting over, I thought I was too old to date. I was 34 when my divorce was final and I had two young teenagers. They didn't approve of any man that I went out with, because he wasn't their father. No one would take his place. In their young minds, I ruined our family. Although they had no idea how my marriage went from "Point A to Point B." I filed for the Big "D" and I was the cause of this mess. Pay backs were hell. They made my dating life miserable, and oh they sabotaged so many dates. Those kids....lucky for me, saved me from  a lot of disasters. Today, I am grateful that they stepped in, for had they not, I might not be where I am today. Business savvy, more independent, and a woman on a mission to find my destiny. I've learned that age is just a number. It's not how old you are, rather, how you've grown gracefully in life that determines your future.

Who in their right mind would want a woman with baggage? My thoughts were, my kids are not baggage. I laid down the law and stated that if a man loved me, he would also have to accept my children for whom ever they are. I felt like we went from a happy family with life by the balls, to a woman lost with two kids that needed her more than ever. Oh I tried to date, it just didn't work out. Most of the men were divorced, some with no kids,... they had NO concept of what it was like to be a parent, and they didn't understand that plans change at the blink of an eye when your kids need you. For years, I thought that I was too old to do the online dating thing...boy was I wrong.

I tried it, and since have learned a lot a about it. You can say I've done my homework. My advice: Don't give all your energy to one person in online dating. If the person does not turn out to be what you want, so what? You met a new person, practiced your conversation skills, and learned more about what you want in a partner. Whether you are 18 or 70, the best way to enjoy a first date is to keep an open mind, focus on the things you have in common, and make your primary goal to simply have a good time.

Then I thought that anyone over 50 couldn't find a date. (Please, if you will, and before you get mad if you are 50+ as you're reading this) understand,....I had no idea that one could find true love at a later stage of their life. In January, I'll turn 50. Dating older women is one of the best aspects of dating at any age. If you are 50+, or 60+ and just starting to date again after a few years or a few decades, however, the uncertainty about where to go, what to wear, and what to talk about can seem almost insurmountable. Don't sweat the small stuff. Take baby steps.

Before the first date, you wonder whether your date will like you, (personally this is a questions we ask at any age) whether you’ll like single older women and how much dating etiquette has changed since the last time you were out there. While there are no absolutes when it comes to senior dating, there are a few tried and true strategies that may help calm your nerves and increase your chances for a successful first date. If you plan to have activities on your first date, make it lunch and combine it with some fun activity so you have more things to talk about while you eat. Dinner sometimes implies more intimacy than you may be ready for on a first date, and having the whole date depend on senior women sitting across from each other and making conversation can create a lot of pressure. If the whole idea of senior dating makes you nervous, consider making your first date a group date with women over 50, or participating in a group activity such as senior travel.

Be smart, and by all means, please be safe, and have an exit strategy. Make certain that you always tell a close friend where you are going, and with whom. Do a background check if it makes you feel better...On most singles sites,  you are going out with people you really don't know well, so stick to public places and tell someone you trust who you are meeting and where you will be. If you start to feel uneasy about the person you are with, then leave. If your gut tells you something doesn't seem right, "Good Lord, listen to your gut!"

 Romance is still alive in our hearts....so enjoy your life. It's a very precious thing, and there is no age limit set for falling in love. If you are fortunate like I am, you'll find 'the' man when the time is right. He may not be perfect, or a perfect '10' but if you are lucky enough to have a groovy kind of love, that's all that really matters....

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