Valentines Day...Easy to Make Homemade Treats!

Year after year women get excited about one special day of the year, that one day that her partner, mate, lover or spouse best not forget or they'll be in the dog house until the following year...Yes, you guessed it...Valentine's Day. This is the sweetest day on Earth, every February 14th gifts are exchanged between lovers. Do you know what you're going to give to your special one? Did you know that sometimes the really great gifts aren't the ones that you buy, rather than the ones you make? The sweetest gift you can give is a homemade gift, and what better then homemade desserts. Who doesn't love chocolate? I found a few articles from the past about Valentine's Day. I've listed a few easy chocolate Valentine's Day desserts to share with you so that you can try them out on your mate. Chocolate dipped strawberries are a favorite for Valentine's Day and they are easy to make and will look so impressive, not to mention delightful to dive into!


Ingredients
• 1 3/4 to 2 cups (11.5- to 12-oz. pkg.) Chocolate, Milk Chocolate or White Morsels
• 2 tablespoons vegetable shortening
• 36 Strawberries

 Directions: do line baking sheet with wax paper, otherwise it could be a disaster!

MICROWAVE morsels and vegetable shortening in uncovered, microwave-safe bowl on MEDIUM-HIGH (70%) power for 1 minute; STIR, and try not to taste test the chocolate, even though most of you will but I'm not looking so go ahead! The morsels may retain some of their original shape. If necessary, microwave at additional 10- to 15-second intervals, stirring just until melted; cool slightly.
DIP strawberries about halfway into melted morsels; shake off excess. Place on prepared baking sheet; refrigerate until set.

For a Decorative touch:
MICROWAVE 1/2 cup White or Semi-Sweet Chocolate Morsels or Baking Bars, in small, plastic bag on MEDIUM-HIGH for 1 minute; knead until smooth. Cut tiny corner from bag; squeeze to drizzle over strawberries. Refrigerate until set.

You can use many other kinds of fruit such as orange segments, apple slices, or banana slices. To package your gift try looking for inexpensive tins or heart shaped boxes at your local craft store. Want to save money? Make your own container. If you are looking for an interactive dessert you may want to try chocolate fondue. This is another easy yet impressive treat.

Ingredients
• 2/3 cup heavy whipping cream
• 2 Dark Chocolate baking bars (8 oz.) finely chopped
• 1 tablespoon orange liqueur (optional) or orange juice
• 1 teaspoon grated orange peel


Directions HEAT cream in small, saucepan over low heat; bring just to a boil. Remove from heat. Add chocolate; stir until smooth. Add liqueur or orange juice and orange peel; mix well.
TRANSFER fondue to fondue pot; place over low heat.
Skewer items for dipping and enjoy!!

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Why Red Lingerie is the #1 color of Sexy...

For so long now it has been said that a lady in red is more attractive than a lady in any other color. It truly can be said that women who do wear red lingerie says a lot about who they are as a woman. Red is the color of passion, of blood, of fire. Designers claim that red is the perfect color for romance. Red lingerie arouses an entirely different kind of passion, passion of a more carnal type, and it says the night on fire with passion. Why are men attracted to women in any color lingerie? Well, lingerie makes a statement. Any woman who wears it whether it be a sexy matching set (bra and panty,) babydoll, teddy,chemise, etc., seems to send a signal to their partner, mate, spouse that says "I am confident and feel soooo sexy." At that point, honestly, men can't get enough! Lets go over a few of the red pieces that I've listed below and why they are so sexy, how they define who you are as a woman, or in their eyes, a goddess and what makes them so turned on that they'll see fireworks in the bedroom!


Red Panties & Knickers
Red lace knickers as I was taught to call them, but to most people the common name, panties, these are a simple piece of lingerie that makes a statement for sure. Perhaps most would say the definition of red  is hot. Perhaps if the red lace panties aren't doing it for you, how about these red ruffle panties? Ruffles are a favorite among many men who wear lingerie because of their feminine connotations and their inherent prettiness. Red panties are the starting point for any red lingerie ensemble. They set the tone and the mood for the rest of the outfit, and they need only conform to your particular desire.

Red Stockings
Red stockings can be obtained in many styles, red nylon stockings, red fishnet stockings, red stockings and suspenders, they're all on the menu for the man who wears lingerie. Red hosiery is the easiest item to find of all the red lingerie options we discuss here, because, for some reason, red doesn't appear to be subject to the laws of 'Valentine's Day and Christmas' which bra and panty sets seem to obey. Topping your red lingerie ensemble off should like putting the icing on the cake.


Red Bra & Panty Set
This is a simple statement. When choosing a bra and panty set always make certain that they match ladies. The bra and panty set can be lace, or satin. Cotton isn't really in much especially with the lingerie line, however, I'm not at all saying that it isn't made somewhere and that you can't wear it. Remember, always pick out the lingerie for YOU first and foremost. Yes, we want our partners, mate, or spouse to love it, but honey, they don't have to wear it...you do. 1) you want to select something that makes you feel like a million bucks. Never wear it too tight, buy a larger size if you must to look and feel comfy, trust me, you'll still look and feel sexy. 2) Confidence shines through when you feel great, so select something that fit's your attire well, that accentuates your figure, eyes, skin tone and hair color.Your confidence comes from within and as Shakira sang once, "Underneath Your Clothes" ....there's an endless story....this is SO TRUE!

Is Sex Ok During Pregnancy?

Often women ask, "Can I have sex during pregnancy?" Unless you have been given strict orders to not have sex during pregnancy, there is no reason physically why you can’t. Although, many women will bend the truth a little so that they don't have to have sex during their pregnancy. What you all need to know is that sex during pregnancy does not harm the baby in any way. Your baby is safely tucked away in the womb, surrounded by a cushion of water. In fact the further along you get, sex will actually rock the baby asleep. That can very beneficial to a mom who wants to have some good love and then good night’s sleep. Be sure to talk to your partner about how you feel and listen to his needs as well. Intimacy is important and talking about what is going on, helps couples remain close and in understanding of each other.

Many people think you can cause a miscarriage from having sex and this is not true. If you are having a normal pregnancy and have not been put on any restrictions, sex will not cause a miscarriage. Unfortunately, if a woman is going to miscarry, she is going to no matter whether or not she refrains from sex. In a normal pregnancy sex is a good thing. It exercises the uterus and keeps the intimacy between partners alive.

The Changes of Pregnancy

Whether or not you are interested in sex while pregnant depends on you and your pregnancy. There are many women who with all the hormones and their side effects just can’t muster enough energy to want sex. Others find that their sexual drive is in high gear and just can’t get enough. It is normal to be in either of those two places or somewhere in between. Many women find that they have different drives with each pregnancy, so if you aren’t in the mood this time don’t be bummed out, it could be different next time. It is better not worry about whether your sex life has gone down or up and just focus on intimacy. It is different for all women. Some feel renewed with their new bodies and no birth control, while others just feel awful.

As the 3rd trimester waddles on, you might feel too big, or can’t be comfortable to have sex, I certainly did. Sex can be the last thing on your mind at this stage of the game. Other women find it a great opportunity to try new things and experiment with new positions. Don’t forget about the men in your life. Many men have no problem with having sex while you are pregnant. For many men, the fact that their wife is carrying their child is the most spectacular thing in the world and they can’t be close enough to them. They want the intimacy and crave to be sexually close to their wives. On the other hand there are men who get a bit freaked out. He might be afraid of hurting his wife with sex or can’t imagine “desecrating” a pregnant woman. Some men find the ever-changing pregnant body not as appealing, like it serves a different function now. Open communication and listening to each other is very important during this time.

Many of the old faithful ways of having sex won’t be working as well and even dangerous as pregnancy progresses. Once you hit the four-month mark, no being on your back, ladies. The expanding uterus can cut off major blood vessels when lying on your back. Now it is time for some new sex positions. Get fun and creative. Remember you have all this extra blood flow and lubrication there right now, use it. This is a great time to experience an orgasm if you have never had one before, or have even better ones. Spooning is a great position and it allows you to lie on your left side, which is the best position for a pregnant lady. Pillows can be used to support a belly and legs.

Listen gals, you need to remember to keep a sense of humor, if things don’t work the first time try new stuff and try again. There is a good chance that you will find sex even better than ever and even experience multiple orgasms. Your breasts might be very sensitive right now, so be sure to tell your partner what feels good and what is too much. Most men would rather know what makes you feel good than anything else, and they're there to work with you to make it comfortable for the both of you.

So, what then you wonder are the rules to follow if you choose not to have sex while pregnant? For those ladies who either can’t or just have no desire for sex, there are many other ways to be intimate and stay close to your partner. Cuddling, kissing, massage, caressing each other, or what ever else you like can be just as good. No matter what happens to your sex life during pregnancy, it’s important to keep the lines of communication open. Tell your spouse/partner how you feel and why? Talk and listen to each other and communicate what you want and need, and be respectful and receptive to your partners needs too. There are other ways to create intimacy during pregnancy...my advice would be get experimental and find something that make you both happy. This is a wonderful time of your life and you are soaking up a brand new kind of beauty. At Simply Delicious Lingerie, we want you to feel pretty and sexy when you are pregnant before, during, and after the pregnancy! Stop by our online store and browse our beautiful line of womens intimate apparel. www.SimplyDeliciousLingerie.com 

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How Sexy is Sexy....I'm Talking About...Mens Underwear

Men's Sexy Underwear...Soooo erotic right? What is it about seeing a man in lingerie that turns a woman on? It could be the unthinkable...yes, the idea that the man is in something that is known to a woman’s place, but this isn't 1950, it's 2012 and today men like to feel just as sexy as we do!  It could just be the eroticism of men in something skimpy that women were never allowed to see unless in the bedroom. Whatever the case may be there is a huge market for men’s lingerie and at Simply Delicious Lingerie, we've got a few tricks up our sleeve to enhance men everywhere! It's not just about giving women that confidence and boost, men love the ego rush just the same when we tell them how smokin' hot they look in sensual thongs or boxer briefs. There are several styles in between, as well. The idea that a man will dress up with his woman or for her is simply amazing and tantalizing to the senses. There is something truly erotic about a man who is willing to dress up and give his lady a show. Move over Chippendales....

So how do you select the right pair of underwear? To know what type of market is out there, you will have to do a bit of research. Make sure that when you find something for him that it will not be embarrassing. Some men think the idea of male lingerie is “weird” if they have never worn it. Here are some styles that you can experiment with before going into the non-traditional type items. http://www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com/ is the place to shop. Our online boutique is open 24/7 and it's purpose is so that you can shop in privacy anytime day or night. We are discrete and we respect your confidentiality. You're orders are always shipped in unmarked packaging.

Many of the traditional, yet sexy lingerie for men are boxers and different types of underwear. Don’t go crazy here ladies, my suggestion is to  start simple and work your way up. Not to mention you need to be willing to wear something similar if you want him to give it a second thought. You have to be fair. If you want him to dress up for you, then you better come home with something cute. Start off with a pair of silk boxers. Even if he is a brief man he will love these. They are not too daring and he won’t even think about the lingerie aspect of them. Once you have done this get him a little something more “risky” like tight boxer briefs or bikini cut briefs. Make sure you come home with a cute little chemise or baby doll to get the mood right. If you don’t, it will be football time for him, or out with the guys playing darts or something. This is the best way to get him to want to shop for sexy lingerie for the both of you and open him up to new things.

Once you both have passed the boundary of lingerie for the bedroom in its most modest fashion, now it is time for a bit of fun. Male thongs and G-string can be extremely exciting. Don't just take my word for it though....You will want to go together so he can pick out what he likes. You want him to feel sexy and comfortable in these so he will wear them for you. If you are looking to really spice up your romance and love life, try our whip smart pleasure swing and crank up the heat! HALF OFF! Buy this incredible swing for hours of fun! Was $269.99 now only $129.99 

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Communication is KEY in Relationships!

If I said it once, I've said it a thousand times,...Communication is KEY! Effective communication and sharing is quite crucial in relationships. Discuss these pivotal subjects to better acquaint, inform and increase understanding between you and your partner. These are things that can't be ignored, these issues need addressed as they can weight on a new relationship if not resolved.

1. Your financial history. How you manage your money is important to share with your partner.

• Talk about your credit history, including whether you've ever been unable to pay your bills, if you make it a point to pay bills on time, and the extent of your debt.
• Also, you'll want to know if your partner is a "saver" or a "spender."
• Even if some of your money management history isn't optimal, this is a topic to be fully open about when you're about to solidify your relationship.

2. Thoughts about religion. How important is your faith? What religious traditions do you follow? Do you and your partner need to make some changes to incorporate your spiritual aspects into your relationship?

3. Ideas about having children and parenting. You might feel like your relationship is a long way from reaching a point where you need to discuss having kids. But if you're thinking of marriage, this is a necessary talk to have first.

• Some questions to answer include: whether you want to have kids in the future, the kind of discipline you want to practice, and how many kids you want.
• Also, finding out your mate's desires in these areas will also serve to make your life path together smoother.
• Parenting ideas and beliefs are often emotionally loaded topics and should surely be explored together prior to marriage, especially if one or both of you already have children.
• If this is a point of contention between you, then come to an agreeable solution or move your separate ways. Don't expect to change someone's mind or sweep this issue under the carpet!

4. Your career goals. Have you considered how your career goals will be impacted by your relationship? Your work life and career aspirations are especially important because they stand to be drastically affected by your decision to marry or reside with your partner.

• Inform your partner how much you aspire to career-wise. This is something they deserve to be aware of as your career pursuits can alter both of your lives.

5. Favorite ways to spend "down time." How you prefer to spend your spare time is integral to your relationship. After all, if you love to read and your partner is an avid sports fan and prefers to socialize with others, some disagreements could result.

• Being aware of these preferences will go a long way toward a less bumpy road ahead for the two of you. Can you imagine not knowing your cherished partner loves to play drums in his spare time and finding that out after you marry?

6. Other life aspirations. When talking with your partner, consider all of your life goals.

• Traveling to France, attending a sign language class, doing volunteer work, or even taking in foster children might be on the list.
• When you consider these examples, it's easy to recognize why you and your partner can benefit by discussing goals in advance of marriage.

7. Discuss any other subjects you or your partner wants to know about. The purpose of this is to clear up anything else that's nagging at you regarding your own life or your partner's. This will help to address any doubts or questions either of you might have.

• Doings this allows the both of you to start your precious time together with a clean slate.

Remember to try speaking openly and honestly about these topics before marriage will improve your communication and your mutual understanding. That should be just what your relationship needs...if it doesn't work and you feel like you are chasing your tail in circles, you may want to rethink your relationship?

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How to Get Rid of that Nasty Cellulite!

 

 

What Is Cellulite?

fatty deposits beneath the skin that give a lumpy or grainy appearance to the skin surface, especially on the thighs or buttocks

cel·lu·lite

1) fatty deposits just beneath skin: 

Cellulite is a term that is used to describe fat deposits under the skin that outwardly give the skin a dimpled, or orange-peel like appearance. I call it fatty cottage cheese or dimples. Where are they found? Well, on most women, this is found on there thigh areas and their buttocks. Now, we all love a little behind cushion, but there is quite a big difference in cushion and plain old fatty tissue.

No one wants bumps in their behind. Cellulite is most often seen in women because the fat is arranged in large chambers separated by columns of collagen fibers.Fibrous strands of tissue connect your skin to deeper tissue layers, creating compartments of ordinary fat cells. When the fat cells increase in size, the compartments bulge and produce the dimpling appearance on your skin, and you ask can it get worse than this? Of course it can, but this can be worked on and as you increase exercise and in some cases lose weight, it diminishes. If you happen to have dimples or cellulite, don't wear white pants, skirts, shorts, no no no! Wear something solid that will take the focus off of your tush. You want to look blended, you don't want to stand out or feel uncomfortable. Cellulite isn't something that any particular man or women gets, in fact, anyone can turn around and one day see things that you didn't realize you had,..mine was when I was trying on swimwear at a department store...when I looked in that we way mirror I wanted to die.

In overweight people excess fat is stuffed in these compartments causing them to bulge out. On the surface of the skin, the bulging provides the dimply appearance of cellulite, especially in areas such as the hips, buttocks or thighs. Oddly enough, cellulite is predetermined by genetics so even thin women can develop the appearance. Factors such as hormones, pregnancy, and aging may all attribute to the weakening of the collagen fibers to give the cellulite appearance.

Even people diagnosed as the “morbidly obese” are not necessarily genetically pre-disposed to cellulite and may display no symptoms at all. It is important to note that even though it is unsightly, cellulite is normal for many women and some men as well. The dimpling appears to be less obvious when the subject has thicker skin which further enforces the genetic predisposition. As the body ages, the skin becomes thinner and there is nothing that can be done for that natural aging process.

Treatments? You bet I have some for you!

There are many expensive massage treatments for cellulite reduction. However, you can follow the same method in your very own home. It's called dry brushing. Buy a shower brush with soft bristles and massage it over problem areas for ten minutes a day. Make sure you massage your skin while it is dry and in circular rotations. This technique not only feels good but it helps remove toxins from the body, improve blood circulation and muscle tone. It also aids in the breakdown of cellulite and helps reduce that jiggle.

Caffeine when applied topically is an extremely powerful ingredient in cellulite creams because of its ability to shrink fat cells. A great way to reduce cellulite at home is to create your own cellulite-reducing coffee scrub. Simply warm coffee grounds and apply them to problem areas with a wash cloth. Next wrap the area with plastic wrap for ten to fifteen minutes. Water helps to leach the caffeine and other alkaloids out of the coffee and the cloth keeps them close to your skin. The warmth of the water helps to open your pores and absorb caffeine, which reduces cellulite by stimulating circulation and helping the body shed fluids. When you feel unsexy, it shows. Every day you should feel great about yourself. You want to feel sensual in your sexy lingerie too! Shop at http://www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com/ for all of your women's intimate apparel needs. We're affordable and want you to look and feel confident and sexy without breaking your bank.

I've heard of some people who leave the coffee against their skin for up to an hour -- but you should be warned, even though this is a great cellulite reduction method, it can temporarily stain your skin brown!


Squats are a fundamental exercise to firm our common problem areas. However, most people forget a second step which works to reduce cellulite. After squatting, women should place their weight on one leg then another, sort of like rocking side to side. This helps to work the muscles that line the outsides of your thighs. Unless you're an ice skater you probably don't use these muscles very often. This addition to the squat aids in cellulite reduction on both legs. Building muscle helps in cellulite reduction by eliminating fat -- which obviously contributes to cellulite. A great way to build muscle is eating a little protein each day. Now, this doesn't mean you should go and eat a bunch of peanut butter! Choose your protein from sensible sources for optimal cellulite reduction.

Another effective cellulite scrub is a salt scrub. Try rubbing cellulite affected areas with Epsom salts (you can usually find this in the drugstore) while in the shower. The salts extract trapped moisture from your cellulite while stimulating circulation. This anti-cellulite scrub also helps firm and tighten skin which aids in cellulite reduction. But remember not to scrub too hard -- you can easily injure your skin.So now that I've given you some ways to gt rid of that nasty old cellulite, give one or two a try and then let me know if they worked for you so that I can share with others. Feel free to leave comments and suggestions. We'd love to hear from you!

Selecting the Right Size Panty

The most classic understatement would be that  women believe picking out panties is easy... NO NO NO!Honesty, it really isn’t as easy as you would think. In fact, it can be down right difficult. There are so many styles and fabrics to choose from that it truly depend on what you like and what you need. The most important thing to know is what size you are. Just because you fit into a specific pant size does not mean that your panties are the same. You have to wear the right pair of panties or you will truly suffer through your day. If you wear the wrong pair, you will absolutely suffer through your day and not be happy at all. There is much to be less than desired when your panties are riding up and chafing you all day. Talk about OUCH! There is nothing worse and unappealing than panties that are constantly falling down or give you that awful wedgie. This can be very distracting to your day, not to mention a negative attention getter. This can all be so easily avoided by fitting your self with the appropriate sized panties form the beginning.

Therefore, gals, please take my advice.....grab a tape measure because you're going to  need it. You will want to measure your waist first. You will want to have the tape measure snugly around you waist without causing any bulging. Don’t cause any cinching that could cause you to go too small. You will want to use the natural indentation and/or break at your hip and waist. If you are having a hard time finding this curve, then bend to the side. You will better be able to see where this crease is and know where to measure. Many women wear the bra and panty sets, including garters and belts. Kick it into sexy gear and flaunt what you've got! Confidence is sensual, and if you feel sassy and seductive, you will shine in and out of the bedroom. Remember, what you have on under your clothes as important as the outfit itself! At www.SimplyDeliciousLingerie.com we have new merchandise coming soon with videos to show you how to wear the individual pieces.

You will want to write this number down and mark it as you waist measurement. This will become very important depending on what type of panty you are buying. Some panties are hip huggers while others have elastic on the waistline. It truly all depends on the style you buy and what you find most appealing on you and comfortable. You will not want to buy a pair of hip huggers that use your waist size. This will cause that not appealing bulge that many women get around their mid section. If you are going to use a waist binding panty then make sure that is what is.

The next step is to measure your hips appropriately, and no cheating, or you'll pay for it. You will want to wrap the tape measurer around your hips in their fullest area. To make sure that the tape measure is straight, so you might need to use a mirror or get a friend to help you. It is very important to make sure the tape measurer is level all the way around your whole body for the proper fit. The tape measurer must be parallel with the floor and snug. Again you don’t want so snug that it causes bulges. You will also write this down to make sure that you know what size to buy. This will help with hip huggers, bikinis, many thongs, and/or string bikinis. We have a variety of boyshorts, thongs, and bikinis to enhance your sexual appeal.

There are must haves in any panty you choose to wear. The most important thing is a comfortable crotch. This is something that if it does not fit right you will know right away and will drive you to never wear those panties again no matter what. The crotch of the panty should fit just right against your body. It should not bunch up in the back or the front and should be tight. For panties that horizontal crotch seems they should be visible at the front of the panties only and not slip back. If the open end of the seem is in the front make sure you do not have them on backwards. Otherwise if the seam moves back it will bunch up and be uncomfortable. How your panties fit is CRUCIAL when it comes to exceeding comfort levels.

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What Should You Look for in a Lifetime Partner?

Everyone wants the happy ever after. Everyone wants to live a good life. How important is finding the 'right' partner? Do you feel that finding the right partner a key ingredient in your recipe for a happy life? While the search can seem elusive, it gets much easier if you learn to focus on the qualities that are fundamental to forging healthy and positive relationships: character, background, personality, and chemistry. Before you say I do...make certain that you validate the intentions of all parties involved. Now, I know what your thinking...that sounds so legal and serious...hey, a life time partnership is serious and is something that shouldn't be entered into lightly.

Character

1. Assess their availability. For a loving relationship, both parties must be available for love. If one of you is already involved with another person, you're already off to a difficult start! Circumstances may change with time or you may need to look elsewhere.

2. Establish trust. Trust is basic to any stable relationship. You deserve a relationship that enhances your peace of mind, rather than creating new anxieties.

3. Look at how they manage conflicts. It's okay to disagree as long as you respect each other's positions. Arguments can even bring you closer together when you both aim for solutions that satisfy both parties rather than seeking victory.

Background

1. Resolve past issues. Regardless of what hardships a person has faced, focus on what they did to overcome adversity and challenges.

2. Discuss previous relationships. People have different comfort levels when it comes to talking about past lovers. Still, it's important to be aware of any patterns and know how to manage them.

3. Learn from each other's family history. Our family experiences often have a profound influence in shaping our lives and our reactions to new events. For example, knowing how your potential partner felt about their parent's divorce might help you understand them better.

4. Find common ground on money matters. Mingling finances is a big step. Get a sense of how compatible you are when it comes to making decisions about spending and saving.

• Many successful couples have different perspectives on economics, but they make it work by balancing each other's strengths and weaknesses.

5. Know each other's expectations about parenting. Parenting is one issue where it's very difficult to make compromises. Before making a commitment, clarify whether you're on the same page with wanting a big family or a family of two. If you want kids and they don't you might want to rethink this one because if you think you can change them into wanting a family...you are in for a long haul and a big let down.

Personality

1. Communicate. Constructive communication is the lifeline for any alliance. Communication skills can be improved with practice, but it's helpful to know each other's habits.

2. Have fun together. After all, you're looking for someone whose company you'll enjoy. If your girlfriend makes you laugh even during tax season, this is a good sign that you may have a future together.

3. Share common interests. Liking the same things will also help you feel more connected. Whether you love film festivals or camping, you can create meaningful experiences and happy memories that you both will treasure.

Chemistry

1. Hey,...let the sparks fly. Physical attraction is one of the greatest joys in life. Sure we find a person who is attractive to us a big deal. As long as all the other elements for a healthy relationship are in place, it's wonderful to find a mate who makes your heart race and your palms sweat.

2. Stay fit & healthy. If your partner leads a healthy lifestyle, you may be more likely to preserve that initial attraction. You might even be rewarded with having more years to spend together.

3. Take a balanced view of romance. It's great to keep romance alive so long as it's free from illusions. Passions will fluctuate over time, but your sense of commitment and affection can keep on growing through the years.

Finding that special someone is vital. We all appreciate feeling validated and having someone to share our happiness. Knowing what to look for pays off when you're looking for love.

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Romance and Why We Fall Out of Love?

Just about every day on a daily basis, I encounter those embodied in a kind of extramarital affair I describe as "I Fell Out of Love...and just love being in love." Can one fall out of love? You be they can. Does it hurt, oh hell yes it does...so what causes this, and what can you do so that it never happens to you? Well, first of all, never say never. I made this mistake... it's when you think that it cannot happen to you that it does. It's when you think it will happy to Sally or Claire, and then it happens to YOU! What happened? You lost communication somewhere in your relationship and love slipped away as quickly as it crept into your life. Lost the romance, the thrill is gone, the flame went out...The cheating or "offending" spouse has encountered someone where there are "sparks!"

Here are common phrases: (to the spouse) "I love you but am not 'in love' with you. The romance in our marriage is gone. I found someone who really loves me." (self thoughts) "I don't want to settle. I have a lot of love to give. He/she treats me like no one else. I feel special with the other person."

The "offended spouse" often responds with increased or new romantic gestures. They fall flat.

At the core of this kind of affair is a deeply engrained belief that "romance" is the savior and benchmark of a great marriage or intimate relationship.

Here are some reflections on romance:

1. "Romance" is advertised in our culture as the ultimate experience in an intimate relationship. Romance is idealized in movies and books as the ecstasy of being "in love." We can't get enough (hugely profitable grocery counter tabloids) of which "stars" are currently "in love" with whom. And, it often does not matter (really) if the are married. Oh gosh, to be like that, to experience that. Wouldn't that be wonderful?

2. Romantic movies are often called "romantic comedies" for a reason." Ever wonder why they are so funny or why they should be? Or, at the other end, romantic movies are tragedies (Romeo and Juliet). Julia Roberts and Richard Gere in Pretty Woman. When Harry Met Sally, The Notebook, and even Cinderella... Ever see a "real" romantic movie? People see romance in a variety of ways.

3. The search for romance whether through an affair or within our marriage often taint powerful personal needs. It has little to do with love and more to do with getting our personal needs met. Most of us have strong needs such as to be acknowledged, adored, cared for or perhaps cherished. Another powerful need is to feel "special. Romance becomes the vehicle through which these needs are supposedly met without needing to name those needs or talk about them. Don't get me wrong. Personal needs are all right. We all have them. Personal needs drive, often powerfully, what we go after. But, and this is a huge but, if we do not consciously name them and get them met once and for all they continue to drive us and we live perpetually in frustration, always wanting more.Once we move beyond the merry-go-round of personal need meeting we discover our personal passion, our purpose and reach down and touch the essence of real joy and peace. Are you getting the picture here? Life isn't perfect, and like a yoyo, we all have or ups and our downs. We just need to learn how to balance our romance and talk about things when they bother you.

4. Romance is it a teaser for  mating? True....Sometimes sex is the bottom line. The "chemistry" described in "romantic love" we are finding, is truly that - raw chemistry. Studies now show that those "in love" have a high concentration of specific dorphins (chemicals) in their bodies. These are the same chemicals found when animals are in "heat."I also believe that we run into a few people in our life-time where we experience this "chemistry." I have no idea why this happens. There appears to be some attraction, based on a huge number of factors that stir our juices - literally. Interesting. But, doesn't mean that I must jump into bed with this person. Maybe some animals do, however.

5. A person seeking romance is often someone looking romantic rush. Some call it a romance high, I call it a romantic rush. Why? They want to feel good. They expect they should feel good. They believe they should jump on something that feels good. They want the pill, the drug, the experience that will take away their pain, their emptiness, their loneliness and make them feel good. They what the  obsession. Obsessions are good and bad...they are healthy, and yet so very unhealthy. Romance your partner whether it be in bed or on the dining room table. Keep the spark alive, thats how to build romance...it's the erotic love that keep us from falling out of love...

 

Are You Getting What You Want in BED?

Let me ask you a question? Are you getting what you want, and by that I mean are you getting sex the way you like it? Sure, you and your partner make love regularly but are you really satisfied with what you do together? If your answer is "Yes, I am perfectly content with my sex life," then that's great. But if your answer is closer to "Umm... well...not so much" then perhaps it's time for a change. Here are some tips for getting what you want in your sex life and enjoying it with your partner.

Know what you want

This sounds painfully obvious, but it's not as simple as you may think. There are numerous reasons why it can be hard to answer the question, What do I want? Some people shut down their desires because they feel funny about them. Others have a very limited knowledge of the countless ways that humans can express themselves sexually. Many individuals don't understand their bodies very well so they don't know how to work them properly either. Listen to your body...it will talk to you!

Understanding what you want requires being open to your most personal thoughts and feelings. There is no need to be judgmental about desire. What do you fantasize about, either during lovemaking or when you're alone? Fantasies are often crazy and unrealistic, but there may be elements that could easily be acted out in the bedroom. If you believe that you are lacking in sexual knowledge, then give yourself permission to learn more through reading books, watching movies, or surfing the web.

Ask for what you want

Now that you have a good idea of what you want, share it with your partner. Try to frame your request in a positive way. Don't complain about how dissatisfied you are with the status quo. Instead, talk about how much you love your private time together and how it exciting it would be if he or she did a certain thing. If he or she seems unwilling to consider your request, then you need to find out why. Once you understand your partner's hesitation, you may be able to come up with a compromise that would be rewarding for both of you.

Give your partner what he or she wants

Listen, If you're getting what you want, it's only fair that your partner gets what he or she wants, right? A sexual relationship should be mutually satisfying or it will hit the rocks pretty quickly. Give your partner an opportunity to talk about his or her own desires and do your best to fulfill them. Ladies, don't withhold sex as a punishment. If something is bugging you, fix the real problem instead of letting your resentment spill over into the bedroom. And gentlemen, you need to understand that pleasing and fully satisfying your partner is the most effective way of getting more sex. My advice...let your guard down and get risque!

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