Relationships = Communication + Trust

Sometimes all women want is to feel loved... Sometimes all we really need is knowing that the man that our world revolves around cares, really genuinely cares. Whether it be showing affection, love or romance, we yearn for it. Some men just don't get it, and others have no problem showing affection a million ways. Why is that?

A mans character they say is determined by who he is and how he acts. Compassion, integrity, loyalty, love, trust...these are all attributes that your man should hold with the highest regards. I don't mean in the boardroom...I also mean in the bedroom. What makes her truly happy? What does she like? Why does she care so much for you? Women I tend to believe are much more emotional than men and our feelings can get picked apart. Our guy may not even know that we are feeling like this.

I am not saying that a woman should be placed on a pedestal nonetheless, he should realize that if he continues to simply appease you just to make you happy, this may not be what you had hoped for in a long term relationship. We should not have to tell our fella what to do, or when to call, or how to 'wine and dine' us. We don't need a 5 Star Restaurant to win our heart. A burnt hot dog on the grill would be sufficient with me if he took the time to cook it for me. How difficult is it though for men to open up and let that wall down? Believe it or not is gets pretty difficult.

We act as if women are the only ones that could have been hurt in a past relationship, nevertheless, when it happens to men, the react a bit differently so to speak. Relationships are not built overnight and in most cases it's not love at first sight. In fact, sometimes the couple didn't even like one another when they first met. Then there are those who meet and get that feeling,...that 'vibe' if you will that there is a definite amount of chemistry and that my friend is all that one needs. Without chemistry you have no chance. With it, you have the world at your feet and the tools to make take this relationship to the next level. Relationships are 50/50. If you are in one that is a 70/30 or an 80/20 you need to look ahead at the BIG picture sista! You two need to communicate.

Sex (my grandmother used to always say) is the easy part...but relationships should not just be built on sex alone. That is truly not enough. Communication and trust are what bond a relationship like glue. Take time to talk to your partner/mate/lover/boyfriend/or your husband. Work on goals where you set a few nights a week aside just for the two of you and then designate other days or evenings to do things with friends, or to work responsibilities. For the gals, select a piece of sexy lingerie so that when you do have that one or two special nights during the week you give him something to remember. Men long for more when they don't have it...so with that in mind, as Madonna would say get sensual and "Express Yourself!"

It's All About Respect

I'm going to touch on a sensitive subject and it is one that everyone needs to focus on and take control of. I'm speaking of RESPECT. If you are a self respecting individual, chances are you want others to treat you with respect. No one wants to be put down or made to feel belittled in any way, yet people tend to do it day in and day out often not even thinking about what they've done nonetheless grasped their actions and what their negativity can do to someone.

On the contrary to what so many think about respect coming with maturity, that's simply hogwash. Age is not a prerequisite nor is it a magic key to gaining respect. I've seen plenty of people who are young be highly respected from their elders. I've also come across older people who I'd never respect because their actions are so out of line. It's about how you conduct yourself, your attitudes towards others and your actions.Regardless of whether you are a teenager, a student, a new member in your team/company, or someone starting out in the industry, you can be well respected by others, and my advice...You deserve it!

How do you treat one another?  Respect is after all a 2-way street. If you want others to respect you, you've got to respect others first. If you've ever come across someone who isn't being respectful to you, I invite you to think of just one person you're not being respectful to in your life now. Chances you'll find at least someone. Rather than harp on how people are not respectful to you, work on being respectful to those people you're treating poorly. Choosing how to better yourself is much more vital than worrying again about someone else. I was raised to respect myself, and I do. I firmly believe that how you act reflects upon others. Just by your actions you can change the way someone negative looks at perspectives and paint a much bright picture of how kindness is delivered.

In every field of work, the most highly regarded people are those who are the best at what they do. Everyone loves competent people, especially those who present their best work all the time. If you're just starting out in your profession, that doesn't mean you're not deserving of respect. It's about starting small and building from there.

 Whether it's in a professional or social setting, it's not appropriate to bad mouth people. Never ever, ever bad mouth others. It's almost as bad as gossip and let me tell you my friends, your uncertain actions WILL catch up to you, and when they do, it won't be pretty. You certainly don't earn respect this way. If you're unhappy with a certain individual and what he/she is doing, talk to him/her and work things out. Don't talk behind his/her back. This is the kind of behavior that attracts gossip and negativity and it spreads like wild fire. What you think about someone else or state can reflect upon what others now think of a certain individual or a group of people. Not only does it reflect badly on you as a person, it also hurts the other party, whether you realize it or not. Be honest and transparent in your communications, and for heaven sakes, stand up for yourself and your beliefs!

 Have you ever come across people who simply agree with whatever others say without much thought? I have, and it gets meaningless after a while as they just say yes to everything. Personally, I have more respect for someone who disagrees and stands up for himself/herself than someone who parrots others. Likewise, it is by having your own opinion and a mind of your own that you get respect from others. Just be YOU! I say that over, and over like a broken record. Don't be afraid to stand up for what you believe in, but do make sure you do it in a respectful manner to others.

Now ...here's my big beef: honor what you say. No one likes a dishonest or unreliable person. A well respected individual is one who is honest in his/her communications and can be trusted to do what he/she promised. I believe integrity is the first step to being our highest self. I always ensure I live up to my commitments and deliver beyond what I promise. If due to some reason you can't honor your commitments, make sure you address them accordingly to the other party and make up for it.

Be open to criticism. Contrary to popular belief, being respected doesn't mean you won't receive criticism. In fact, it's quite the opposite. This is key. Keep your cool and be the bigger person. Always entertain someones opinion or suggestions. It does not mean at all that you have to do as they say, but hey,...sometimes we have to listen and learn from others, especially if their advice will benefit you.

It is common sense to know that before you can demand respect from others, you must first respect yourself. It's funny that many of us seek respect from others, yet we don't even respect ourselves. Do you love yourself wholly and unconditionally? Do you treat yourself poorly? If so, it's time to make some changes whether it be in your work, your personal life, marriage, eating habits, exercise. Yes, both mentally and physically this is imperative.

 I heard a quote a while back and I loved it. I'll share it; "It's better to be an original version of yourself than an exact duplicate of someone else." try to remember that....People respect individuals who are original. Too many people try too hard to be someone else they are not and in the end they don't have a sense of identity. Discover who you are and what you stand for. What the world needs are more people who are true to themselves, not those trying to be a clone of someone else!

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About Simply Delicious Lingerie:

Simply Delicious Lingerie is an online boutique specializing in sexy lingerie from designers such as Carrie Amber Intimates LLC ‘SeventilMidnight’, Be Wicked, Elegant Moments, Fantasy Lingerie, Raveware, and WMS Clothing. Our lingerie is the aphrodisiac of taste, and represents beauty and luxury at an affordable price. At Simply Delicious Lingerie we've personally selected a variety of sexy lingerie just for you and all of your sensuous rendezvous. We sell accessories, Bordello shoes, Pleaser shoes, garter sets, bridal lingerie, bridal undergarments, honeymoon lingerie, wedding day lingerie, wedding garter sets, wedding petticoats, affordable plus size lingerie, Halloween costumes, sexy plus size costumes,  fantasy lingerie, matching lingerie sets, men’s underwear, men’s Lingerie, sexy thigh high stockings, satin pajamas, plus size sleepwear, adult novelty items and sex swings including the Whip Smart Pleasure Swing. Have a lingerie party with us and experience fun!  Our mission is to take your sexy lingerie needs to the next level of comfort, intrigue, romance and sophistication. For more information or to place an order today please visit http://simplydeliciouslingerie.com/  Say YES (your everyday sexy) to Simply Delicious Lingerie! ®

The Truth About What Women Want...

From the time we are little girls, we dream of our wedding day and what it is that will make us happy in a lifetime partner. Some might say that we are impossible to figure out. So what is it about women that makes them so hard to grasp? Most of the time, men are frazzled by this question? Some men think that women are only attracted to jerks and to the bad boy type. Theoretically, this is true more often than not unfortunately. Some men are convinced that women want money and security. Listen fellas, there are, on the contrary to what ya'll may think good gals out there. We aren't all devilish and gold diggers. Others are sure that women only want men just like their fathers, and some have decided that not even the women themselves know what they want. I find this statement to be true,...in fact, most men will tell you that we don't know what we want at all. Many a man have questioned "what exactly do women want?" We're not playing coy here, we know we're complex creatures nevertheless we operate on a different wave-length than men.

News Flash Boys; None of those ideas are accurate.

The truth about what women want is quite simple... And here it is: Each woman is different. In order to know exactly what she wants, you need to ask her. If that doesn’t match up with what you already have to offer, then you need to move on. Some desire a sensitive man, a GQ fashionable guy, others seek a wealthy fella, they may even ask what does he drive? With that said, there are several qualities that most women desire in a man, and it doesn’t hurt to see which ones you have or are willing to develop. In fact, it can help you a lot in your personal life. There are 3 things that almost every woman wants that should NOT have to be explained, but for those of you on the short bus, here goes;

Respect.... Show us through your actions that you respect our opinions, careers, interests, friends, bodies and minds. You don't have to agree with all that we say or do, but try to honor our opinions as valuable contributions. Follow the golden rule and treat us as you would like to be treated: Be honest, fair, kind, and considerate.

Romance... It's another night on the couch with take-out and TiVo? Just because we're staying in doesn't mean the evening can't be romantic. Light a few candles and see where the night leads. Treat us like your girlfriend, even after we become your wife.

Consistency... This doesn't mean be boring and predictable. It means that we know you will (usually, no one is perfect!) give us the love and support we need. Knowing that you're coming at this with the same desires and energy as we are goes a long way to making us feel secure.

The bottom line is this;

Most women not only admire, rather want a secure, confident, financially and emotionally steady man. The details may be different, but the effect is the same: a man who has a stable life isn’t likely to ruin theirs. Some women who’ve been brought up in an unstable home are going to be a little confused about the meaning of a stable life, but for the most part, women like relationships that are a safe bet to improve their lives. Your attitude, above all, is going to determine how attractive you are. If you take care of yourself physically, emotionally, financially, and mentally, you are already more attractive than any man out there who thinks women only like jerks and bad boys. 

If your financial affairs are in order, you are free to see the difference between women who only want money and the ones who are truly interested in you. If you carry yourself in a confident manner, you are already more attractive than men who think women only want younger versions of their fathers or that they don’t have any idea what they want.

What women want is simple, easy to learn, and follows common sense. You don’t have to do crazy things to get noticed or make yourself attractive. You need to do just the opposite – be practical in your everyday life and it will pay off later. So now, your homework is to look at your life and see the areas that need to be taken care of. If you have problems, don’t expect that a girlfriend is going to fix them, and if you think this will happen I ask you "What the hell type of bubble are you living in?" You’re an adult and you can handle it. Besides, you’re not going to get a girlfriend so she can come in and straighten your life out. You might clean up nice, but how would she ever know? You need to have your problems worked out for yourself before you invite a woman into your life. If you want to find a great woman, make sure that your affairs are in order as that alone will be quite impressive in her eyes.

If you still aren't understanding how women function, and think, you need to understand the communication process. 

Relationships...Don't Put Your Foot In Your Mouth

How many times has this happened to you? You get all dressed up and think you're looking hot, and he says..."Are you going to go get ready to go out?" What? Does he NOT KNOW that we just spent hours preparing for this date and days deciding what we were going to wear? Most likely no. Why? Because most men find their outfit in less than 10 minutes and stop stay up all night wondering about things like we do....
So, when he says something like this that offends you a tad bit, try not to put your foot in your mouth with a lame comment or something rude...OK, so your man has hurt your feelings? This happens now and then.
We women have a tendency to be incredibly emotional creatures.  There is nothing wrong with that but, there are good and bad ways to tell your man that he has done this. First, men do not think like we do, so therefore, they don't get it, and couldn't possibly understand our feelings...if we are PMS'ing...Dear Lord, forget it. You might as well tape my mouth shut because you never know what will come out of it!

Most often, there is a very good chance that your man did not mean to hurt your feelings.  In some cases, he may not have even realised that he did. A man who genuinely cares for you wants to know if he has hurt you.  Of course he wants to know! He wants to know, so that he can take steps to fix the situation, or try to avoid doing so again. You matter to him, remember? However, there is a right and wrong way to go about letting him know how you feel at times like this.

I preach this to you ALL THE TIME,...Communication is key!  Men do not like ‘drama’. So no drama mama!  Even if he loves you a great deal, a man will shy away from you the minute you start to tearfully accuse him, or insult him, or yell and scream and rant at him because you are upset.  Men really do not like such emotional displays. take my advice now and do what my mother said..."Put a sock in your mouth, and keep the yap shut!" They don't need to hear it nor do they want to heard us babble. As the years went by, I learned that mom was right. Talk about your problems, and if feelings get hurt, discuss them. The longer they go unspoken of, the harder it is to discuss it. Talking does a world of good, so do it!

 Perhaps you have decided to give him ‘the silent treatment’, instead? I was sooooo good at this when I was married. There is a good chance that, if a man does not recognise this as a passive-aggressive display of anger on your part, he will simply think that you wish to be left alone, and will not approach you.
No.  Calm yourself down first before approaching him on the matter.  No tears, no accusations, no emotional displays. Wait until you are calm and, once you are, express yourself in a clear, emotionless, and honest way.  Tell him that you are feeling upset and why, as concisely as possible.  There is no need to go into hours worth of detail, either!  That is equally ineffective so give it up. Rest your voice, and save your strength!

Resist the urge to accuse him; as if he knew that he was hurting you.  Do not say, for example, “You love making me feel bad about myself”, or “You say you love me? Well, you obviously don’t because you just said…”  Remember, he may not have even realised that he had hurt your feelings, so don’t assume that he knows or has done so deliberately!  This kind of accusation will also put him on the ‘defensive’ straight away, and you want to resolve the conflict, don’t you?  Once both of you are angry, or he has fled the situation in order to escape the ‘drama’, conflict resolution is very difficult to achieve, now, isn’t it?
Avoid ‘absolutes’, too.  Saying things like “You always say…” or, “You do this all the time…” are examples of ‘absolutes’.  These should be avoided when you speak with him. Men really do appreciate being approached calmly. They love a woman with a soft touch and some sensitivity every now and again...so cut them some slack already! They are more likely to listen to you, tackle the situation, and work on resolving it if you can talk to them calmly, and explain why you feel the way that you do.

There is nothing worse than acting like a baby and putting your foot in your mouth, so ladies, stop it!

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