Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Relationships…Why They Fizzle

Unlike 50+ years ago when my parents wed, relationships are not as easy as one might think and taking vows are in my opinion these days more or less are seriously being taken for granted. Anyone that says relationships are easy is probably the 2% static rate that actually does have a pretty fabulous gig. The other 98% however need to work on theirs each and everyday in order to make it work. Tina Turner once sang "What's love got to do with it?" The answer to that questions is EVERYTHING!

Making it work isn't as difficult as one might think, on the other hand, for many people it is quite challenging to say the least. Communication and trust are two key factors in any and all relationships. You have to have a solid foundation to build on or like quicksand you'll sink and the relationship will go under. Love takes days, weeks, months and even several years to make it right but the rewards are so great for those of us in relationships that struggle and learn from one another day in and day out.

Relationships are not based on sex alone, however, the sex appeal that we possess in a relationship and the teasing that we can do adds a little playful zest. I believe that things can get boring and fizzle if we allow them to and this happens when you get too busy in your own life and wrapped up in your own issues to make time for the one that you are with. Sometimes a woman feels like her boyfriend or husbands assistant talks to him more than she does. Often he has no clue to this as he just thinks that this is work and in all men's minds, work is work. Guess what fellas, it's not always about the mighty buck, and it's not always about you. It's not always about what you have or how quickly you rise to the top that makes you successful…more times than not it is was the voice of your loved one telling you to hang in there and take it one day at a time that is the key to your own financial freedom and success. Like your relationship, this too is built from solid ground. This goes the same way for women who are business savvy and succeed. More often than not, your partner was the drive behind your success and he/she was the one that got very little of your attention along the way.

Relationships need to be nurtured and worked on daily so that the love can continue to grow. How can we keep it real and have that playful fun that I speak about? Passion for someone grows over time and love doesn't happen over night. My grandmother used to say that if you were lucky enough to find that one man that made your heart skip a beat…that one man that could know what you were thinking before it was said and that one man who could ready your body language like a book that he would not only be your best friend rather your life long partner through good, bad and the ugly. I was at the beach once a few years ago and saw an elderly couple holding hands. I said hello and we began to talk. They shared with me that they were enjoying their 65th wedding anniversary where they met, there on the beach. I asked if everyday was easy for them? They laughed and said no way. They stayed strong by staying in tune with one another. They communicated and they looked at every day as if it was the first day that they met and fell in love. I walked away from that 5 minute conversation with a new outlook on life and relationships.

If you have a relationship that is brand new or if it is 20 years old find ways to keep the spark alive! If you lack lust then dig deep and find it again. Not sure where to begin? Relate back to what made your partner smile when you first met. Bring her flowers for no reason at all. Leave her a card next to her pillow that says she is special…How about a glass of wine and some jazz music when he comes home from work to relax and unwind? How about a nice dinner served by you in something sexy? Foreplay is quite erotic you know? Perhaps you need to escape for a weekend or a nice week long vacation. When was the last time that you and your partner went somewhere over night and had fun and really enjoyed one an others company? When was the last time you thought about planning and adult vacation?

Plan a surprise weekend or a trip and make it all about you! Love doesn't disappear over night…sometimes it just lies idle for a while waiting for that spark to come back. What are you waiting for my friend? Ignite it! Make it happen and put your partner ahead of everything else today. Wake up the relationship before it is too late. For those of you who don't have any issues and everything is peachy, now is your time to plan an adult travel and getaway for some R&R. Everyone needs to get away from the everyday reality that they live in day in and day out. Get spontaneous! Get adventurous! Find some sexy lingerie and entice your partner. Whether you do it on a boat, on a beach, in a beautiful hotel room or in the privacy of your own home make it like an oasis paradise and one to be remembered.

You're asking yourself "what the hell does she know about relationships…she sells lingerie for a living?" Folks, I could write a book on relationships. I've learned from plenty of my own mistakes. You get out of a relationship exactly what you put into it. Relationships are a lot like lingerie. Its all about finding what looks best on you, what you are comfortable with and how to make it fit and flow well. You wouldn't want a partner that was overbearing or controlling and you wouldn't want a piece of lingerie that you felt like you were suffocating in because it didn't fit properly because you chose the wrong size. Finding what meshes well together is have the battle. Connecting with that certain someone is like finding the missing piece of ones puzzle. Every relationship needs some tweaking from time to time. Grow together. Do things together as a couple for heaven sakes. Make time for your relationship. Go relax on a beach, go have a couples massage at the spa, take a horse back ride, watch the sunset sharing a glass of wine…together. Isn't your relationship worth it? Don't lose the fizzle. All you need is love…







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