Keeping The Sizzle In Your Relationship

Ask any man what happens most when they enter into a relationship with someone how they feel and they will tell you that they are with the hottest woman on the planet who seduces him ever chance she gets. He'll tell you that she is enticing and erotic. He'll say she has moves that rock his world. He'll tell you that he has a great love life and sex life. Men have a yearning for intimacy. They crave attention both mentally and physically. What I am hearing from a lot of men is that after they move in together or marry that it all goes from sizzle to fizzle. Why you ask? I'm not sure really...some women feel that they have to keep up a sensual portrayal in the relationship.

Some women do it in fear that they will lose their man if the sex diminishes over weeks, or months, or years. Ladies, if this is the case, you're out of your league and you went into a relationship with a lot of false expectations of what a real true relationship is. Sex is not the answer. YES it is fabulous, but there is much much more to a good relationship than just sex. That's the easy part. If this is what you've built your relationship on my friend, you are setting your relationship up for failure. Whether your relationship is new or you've been in it for 20 years, you have to keep it fresh and enjoy every day together.

Relationships are like a well blended recipe. You need the finest of ingredients to make the dish taste delicious. The same holds true with a good relationship. You need a friendship base mixed with a solid foundation first. You need to set boundaries. You need to communicate and most definitely know that you can trust this person. Without communication and trust you're relationship will sink like quicksand. My suggestion is to build a foundation with this person. Lay some ground rules and give one another the space necessary to not feel overwhelmed by a new relationship. Keep your friends, stay active and allow your mate to do the same.

Being in a relationship does not mean being attached to the hip with the person. It means that you have found someone that you like, or love and are fond of and want to develop more with them. Relationships don't happen over night. They take weeks, or even months to build. So many times I hear people say that they were all 'hot and heavy' at the beginning when they first started dating and after several months that went out the window. Teasing and pleasing are what keep a relationship alive.

I'm not a professional here BUT when you start off in any new relationship and give a man what he wants all the time at the drop of a hat, he tends to learn to expect it. Oh yeah sure sex in the middle of the night is erotic but what happens when you are together all the time and you have to cram for an exam, or wake up early for a conference call and you need your beauty sleep? He is not going to want to hear "baby no, I'm tired....not now!" Sex is a beautiful thing and being sensual with your partner is an intimacy that you share in and out of the bedroom. Sex isn't just something you do at night or in the bedroom for that matter. Try new things...and try them in new places. The kitchen, the billiard room or the laundry room? The bedroom isn't the only place to make whoopee!

I believe that in all relationships there is what I call 'give and take.' You give a little, he gives a little. You give a lot, he gives a lot. You have to learn what one another needs. You have to understand when you can lay it on thick and when you need to back off and give your partner space. No one wants to be suffocated in a relationship. You have to have much respect and trust for this person. You have to openly communicate with them and talk about your needs.

What mot couples tend to lack later in relationships is fun. The sizzle goes to fizzle because they laid it on thick at the beginning and now they seem boring perhaps? Not true...ask any red blooded man what he likes and he'll tell you foreplay. Ladies foreplay isn't a chore...it's a fun way of making your partner feel desired. Shop together online at SimplyDeliciousLingerie.com or SimplyLusciousLingerie.com for sexy intimate apparel that will crank it up a notch in the bedroom and every room. Role play in the bedroom. Step outside of your comfort zone every now and then. Try new things, but never make your partner feel that if you don't do something he'll be angry. Relationships are 50/50. It's a two way street my friend. Making it work is not easy, but my grandmother used to tell me that anything worth having is worth working for. The real deal is truly worth the wait and the effort.


Foreplay is something that you can do all day....Make your man feel the hunger. Give him something to crave. You need to slowly seduce him. Have fun, enjoy your relationship and build it day by day. Rome wasn't built over night, and neither are relationships. Chemistry is key and when you've got it, that's your main ingredient. Give him a sample of what is in store for him tonight when he arrives home. Make him thirsty for you. Believe me, making a man sit and think all day about what his lover is cooking up at home will be all that he has on his mind...and I'm not talking about dinner! Keeping the relationship alive and fun shouldn't take a lot of hard work. It takes knowing your partner well enough to keep the romance alive and with this the love will continue to grow. When you have this, your relationship will most definitely sizzle and in more ways than just bedroom fun.

PoNdEr THis....LeT's TaLK aBoUt SeX!

WhAt is SaFe SeX?

From the time I was a young girl, I heard about it, and knew of it, but quite honestly, my parents never taught us kids what sex was in a true essence so imagine when we discovered it how wonderful it was? Yes, wonderful all right, then 9 months later I was walking the floors with a colicky baby that cried and took my social life away. I was young ...Yes, naive? Very much...My thoughts were, "It won't happen to me..." So I did what most girls do. I gave into temptation.

Let me tell you about temptation. First off if you are a young lady reading this and you think that having a baby is easy... Call me, I've got news for you! Your life is OVER...or at least until that baby is raised and supporting itself. Raising a child is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. You learn to immediately put YOUR NEEDS on the back burner for at least 20 years! Now multiply that, ..I have 2. No, I was not a single mother, I did marry the man who knocked me up as so many people called it. I actually loved him and we were planning to marry, just not yet. At 19 though, do we really know what love is? I look at my kids now, who turned out GREAT and I pat myself on the back for everything that went right when so, so many things could have gone wrong. I guess that's where values came in.

Sex is a beautiful thing, what I suggest is to just think long and hard gals before you do it, because like me, who thought "it won't happen..." it just might. Then what are you going to do? Getting on to why we're really here...it's discovering and learning about sex. For goodness sake, make sure you know your partner. One night stands are fun and all sure, BUT in comparison to my life, that one night might affect the rest of your life, and I don't mean with a pregnancy, I mean if you are too quick to "do" and too stupid to "think" you can end up with a serious STD. These days, they are everywhere. If you have one, don't hide it. Make sure that you tell your partner. After having had this conversation with a very close friend, I learned that although I wouldn't have wanted a man to know my secrets, but IF I had something, the practical and honest thing to do would be to get it out in the open. Why did I think differently than her? For a few reasons, I can count on less than two hands the number of men I have slept with in my lifetime and she...well, she could write a book on the men of her life. My values were different, and again it goes back to the fact that I was quite naive.

Now, lets talk cold hard facts about the attributes of sex, and the misleading topics. To the women who are reading this that think by having a baby at a young age it will solve all of your financial problems I say WTF are you thinking? Here's where I'm coming from on this matter.

If you are a parent and you have kids, teach them all that you can about sex so that they know you did a great job raising them, and add this finishing touch that might change their life and allow them to do things the right way. Save them from what I went through at such a young age. Please do not misconstrue what I am saying, I have NO REGRETS. I followed the path and I am who I am today because of my past. Babies are a joy, but babies shouldn't be having babies! If I knew then what I know now....well, you know how that saying goes?

So let's talk safe sex shall we? What is it? Safe sex is the practice of using precautions when having sex. The reason for this is to avoid getting or passing on a sexually transmitted disease (STD) or other infection. STDs are contagious diseases caused by germs, usually bacteria or viruses. They are usually passed to others through sexual intercourse or other sexual contact. STDs include Chlamydia, genital warts, gonorrhea, syphilis, hepatitis B and C, herpes, and human immunodeficiency virus (HIV). Some STDs in females, if not treated, can make you infertile (not able to have babies). HIV infection can cause acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS), which may be fatal. Body fluids can contain the germs that cause STDs. They include saliva, urine, blood, vaginal fluids, and semen.

• Safe sex precautions decrease or prevent the exchange of body fluids during sexual contact. There are a number of measures you can take to practice safe sex. The safest measure is complete abstinence (not having sex with anyone). Other measures include limiting your number of sexual partners and avoiding vaginal and anal intercourse. The most important measure when having intercourse is to use a condom (rubber). Avoid sexual contact with anyone who has an untreated STD or while they are being treated. Certain safe sex practices may also be used to help prevent pregnancy.

Safe sex means taking precautions during sex that can keep you from getting a sexually transmitted infection (STI), or from giving an STI to your partner.
STIs are also referred to as sexually transmitted diseases, or STDs. (sexually transmitted disease) These diseases include genital herpes, genital warts, HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, hepatitis B and C, and others.

Information

A sexually transmitted illness (STI) is a contagious disease that can be transferred to another person through sexual intercourse or other sexual contact. Many of the organisms that cause STIs live on the penis, vagina, anus, mouth, and the skin of surrounding areas.
Most of the diseases are transferred by direct contact with a sore on the genitals or mouth. However, some organisms can be transferred in body fluids without causing a visible sore. They can be transferred to another person during oral, vaginal, or anal intercourse.
Some STIs can also be transferred by nonsexual contact with infected tissues or fluids, such as infected blood. For example, sharing needles when using IV (in the vein) drugs is a major cause of HIV and hepatitis B transmission. An STI can also be transmitted through contaminated blood transfusions and blood products, through the placenta from the mother to the developing baby, and sometimes through breastfeeding.
The following factors increase your risk of getting an STI:

• Not knowing whether a partner has an STI or not
• Having a partner with a history of any STI
• Having sex without a male or female condom
• Using drugs or alcohol in a situation where sex might occur
• If your partner is an IV drug user
• Having anal intercourse

How do I practice safe sex?

Don't do it! Sex isn't all it's cracked up to be. haha, just kidding...If abstaining from sexual activity with a partner is not practical for you, you should do all of these:

• Avoid activities or items that can pass germs: Avoid vaginal or anal hand intercourse, mouth to mouth or french (wet) kissing, or using saliva (spit) as a lubricant. Do not use dildos, vibrators, and other sex toys on both yourself and your sex partner.
• Condoms and barriers:These are usually made from latex. If you are allergic to latex, use a non-latex product such as polyurethane.
  • Condoms: Use a condom every time you will have vaginal or anal sex. Condoms for both men and women are available. Condoms can prevent germs from spreading and help keep a woman from getting pregnant.
  • Barriers: An oral barrier, such as a dry condom or latex square, must be used when doing oral sex.
• Limit sexual partners: Have sex with a single partner or avoid multiple sex partners. Also avoid having sex with strangers or those with unknown sexual history.
• Testing and treatment:
  • Screening tests: If you are sexually active, you should get tested for STDs on a regular basis. This is very important if you have multiple sexual partners. You may have an STD and not know it. If you are pregnant, you will be screened for STDs to prevent passing them to your unborn baby.
  • Suspected infections: Get tested if you think or know you had contact with someone who has STD. See a caregiver if you think you have an STD for early treatment. Tell all your sexual partners if you are diagnosed with STD so that they may also be tested and treated. Do not have sex while you are being treated or with a partner who is being treated. Do not have sex until your caregiver tells you it is safe to do so.

• One last note; Before you sleep with someone, think about how many partners he may or may not have had in the past, because what you don't know, is that now, they are part of you as well.

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